[bellazmama]

Within the first several months of bringing Bella home, more than a couple of people commented on what a nice "tan" she had. My DH told one lady that we had gotten one of the new Graco baby tanning beds and that we just loved it. He told another person that she was going to be in the new baby Hawaiian Tropic calendar.

LOL!

[Petiroux]

I guess I'm really a novice, I started a new thread instead of replying...

I tend to agree with BrandyHagz & oh well! People in general are curious & don't always intend to be rude.

I get comments about my bio-kids all the time. They're very blonde with blue eyes and both my husband and I have brown hair and brown eyes! The funny part is our adopted (almost) daughter fits right in with the other kids -- not us.

[MMC66]

We have only had our baby for a little over a month, Already I have gotten lots of comments about her "complexion" Lots of comments start out with a compliment like "she has such beautiful skin" then are followed by something stupid like you all have mentioned. I have started just saying "thank you" ans so far that has been enough.

I think as aparents we have so many emotions related to our children that sometimes our defenses go up or we feel a need to explain when there is no reason. Babies and children are beautiful - sometimes when people are used to looking primarily at white faces, a darker skinned child seems especially beautiful. I think people RARELY make those comments to hurt or offend so we should be careful and try to come up with responses that will help them become MORE comfortable with "rainbow families" not less.

Probably somewhat idealistic. Our town is small and the person who makes the comment today could be Addy's soccer coach in a few years - I don't want to burn any bridges.

Just my 2 cents.

God Bless,
Martha

[Cheril3]

Hi there!!!!
I'm first nations, light brown skin and black hair and dark brown eyes and my parents are both brown haired and blue-eyed and they are both white. This is something we've dealt with a very long time...what we've always told people who are curious or confused is that I'm adopted...my dad will joke and say I'm from his first marriage---he's never been married before my mom..tee hee.!!! Not trying to make light of your situation, but having a sense of humor sure does help... Sometimes just telling them baby is adopted is enough but sometimes it is tough to deal with people who are close minded and don't know the situation. I hope for you things get better. Sometimes people make thoughtless remarks before thinking. My mom always said I get my good looks from her...

[Roon63]

"I find every comment a wonderful opportunity to educate people about adoption"...Brandy

"I can't take credit for the face,
but I can for the smile"...Bellasmom

I love these quotes,
my children
8, very white/pink with freckles and blue eyes..
6, hispanic/white with green eye
twins 5, hispanic/zuni indian

my hubby's response to people who say how beautiful his girls are(twins) is that yes, they look just like their mother (me)....I am pink, pink pink! They look at me, and back at the girls.
Our kids now, we'll save people who start asking, and say, "silly, we are adopted" It helps the adults to stop asking questions like the children arn't there.

[Nellee]

I have 4 bio and 5 adopted girls, and amazingly we all look pretty much alike. The one who looks most like me is an adopted one! The thing I get comments on is the ages--they're too close together. People look real confused and ask "how'd you do that?" I reply (in best super-hero voice) "I'm Super-Mom--I don't need nine months!!!" Or just "Go home and think about it--you'll figure it out!"

The other one I hate is "Which ones are your real kids?" I tell them, well, other then the few made of plastic, they're all real! People never seem to get that they are not "someone else's" kids. Yes, they're adopted, and yes, they're all MINE.

My favorite comment so far from a total stranger--"Boy, you were really poppin' 'em out, weren't you?" I looked him in the eye and said "Yep! And there's another on the way!"

I love being a mom!

[bellazmama]

That is so great!

Sarah