[Peggy]

I think it would then help for you go to an agency. So you have a worker assigned to you. Your parameters are wide enough that you should not be given any grief or be blackballed. When I went to an emergency staffing meeting (with other possible parent matches) my social worker went with me and she was the one to say no to the child presented.

[amparosotolongo]

Hi!

1-2 In the process of adopting girl from Guatemala

3 South Florida “Sunshine State” ☼

4 No


Thanks

Ampy

[maureentherese]

I am working through the State of Nebraska, and they have contracted agencies: for example, my homestudy was done via Lutheran Family Services, and my caseworker appears to be at the Child Saving Institute. I don't know that I have a caseworker. At this point, my foster care license is still being redone. All my forms are in, but I must be refingerprinted. Now, my son is eighteen (a senior) and he must be fingerprinted as well. That's scheduled for next week. After that, a homevisit, and then they say I will be in line for fos/adopt.

My team assessment went really well, and they had me write to them what my parameters might be, and so I developed a sheet of what that might be, and we'll go from there.

However, in the meantime, while this was all going on, our local university needed homes for two foreign exchange students, both staying between four and six months. We've had two of them now for two months. So I am guessing that will preclude a foster care placement till they go back to Korea and Columbia. Perhaps that's God's will, as we need to get through Mark's graduation in the next two months. But I am SO ready in my heart.

I wish life were perfect, but it is what it is, and I am doing the steps I need to do to get a placement. I said preferably girl, with no more than mild mental problems or disabilities, birth through seven years. But I said, this is my idea, so don't preclude me! Just ask! I would also take a sibling group, after all I have been a single parent of my two bio children for fourteen years.

Other suggestions for me?

[Peggy]

Your Parameters are very close to what mine were. I upped my age to 8, because that is appearantly a common cut-off, and a lot of 8 year olds get passed over. I did end up with a girl who just turned 8 when we were matched. It took a year for my match, but she was definitely meant to be my child.

[maureentherese]

I would love to know more. We were matched with a nine year old girl previously, and were doing home visits when she became very intentionally cruel to my bio daughter, and acting out sexually a bit iwth my son. She didn't want us, and she really didn't want our religion - smart kid and she had been fully indoctrinated by nearly three years of an Evangelical family that Catholicism was really stupid, bad, didn't make sense. She was adamant and vocal, AND wrote a long letter expressing that she would accept adoption with someone because the judge "said" and she was going to bide her time till she was old enough to get back to her bio-mom. Judge had ordered visits be maintained with bio mom and bio aunts, grandparents, etc who lived here. She had such a strong sense of who she was and it didn't include us. We passed on the adoption and she was quickly adopted by another family.

We all know our own limitations, and she helped me learn some of mine. My son will be leaving for college in the fall, which will hopefully make the next match simpler. The team assessment went over all the aspects of this attempted / failed match and the whole team believed we had done the right thing. There is so much more to the story, but in summary: this little girl did NOT want to be with us, and we decided she was old enough to know her own mind. Age nine - you have very clear opinions by that time.

I would adopt older, I will adopt teens on the next times perhaps, and my parameters aren't locked down, except on the schizophrenia/bipoliar and severe/profound disabilities pieces. My time is limited, etc, as I am a working single parent.

We're hopeful....can you tell me a bit more?

[Overwhelmed!]

Originally Posted by mckenna

i am also catholic and adopting. my son is biracial and i do not feel the catholic schools in my area are culturally diverse enough. he will attend religion classes and be raised catholic but attend a private culturally diverse school in the area. does anyone else have similar concerns?

mckenna- I wasn't aware you were Catholic, so am I! We had Jacob in February and it felt so amazing to be able to pass on my Catholic faith to our son. His birthparents, although not Catholic, knew that we would be raising Jacob Catholic and had no problem with that. When Jacob is old enough, he will be attending religion classes as well.