[HopefulMommy]

Hello,

Long time listener first time caller...Um, I mean I have been lurking for a while on numerous adoption sites and was so glad to come across the Catholic forum.

My Husband and I are beginning to look in to adoption, we are both Catholic. I have been doing lots of research and have just been getting more and more confused.

We are so new in this process we still haven’t decided to go international or domestic. The one thing we agree on is we don’t have to have an infant. My Choir Director works in foster care at Catholic Services and gave me the number of their adoption person, but I don’t want to get “sucked” in to using them with out having any other options/advice.

If anyone has any advice as to how you made your decisions I would be truly greatful. I truly feel God is calling us to be fearless in our decision, but this whole process frankly is frightening.

Advice and prayers appreciated.

[tobeafamily]

Some of the things I recommend prospective adoptive parents beginning the journey ask themselves:

1. How important to you is it that your child share your etnnic heritage?
2. How impotant to you is it that your child be a newborn?
3. How willing or able are you to travel with little or no notice?
4. How prepared/confident do you feel parenting a child who may have been exposed to abuse, neglect, or institutionalization, known or unknown at time of placement?
5. What are you comfortable with spending in fees and expenses?
6. How comfortable are you sharing your values, lifestyle, etc. with strangers?

There is no one 'best way' to adopt, only the best way for you. I'd recommend heading to your library and checking out books on adoption. Read everything you can. Check out a few agencies, go to open houses/information sessions. If there's a local adoption support group, attend meetings.

HTH, best of luck,

Regina, AMom to Ryan Joshua Thomas

[tmarchek]

I don't know what's leading you to adoption, but whatever the reason, there's a particular book we found incredibly helpful as we started to consider all of the different decisions we had to make before we adopted. It's called Adopting after Infertility by Patricia Irwin Johnston, and it has a fantastic outline of the pros and cons of various choices, things to ask yourselves (as was posted previously) and things to ask professionals as you look for an agency or attorney. I highly recommend it as you get started.

By the way: don't be afraid to meet with several agencies before you decide who to work with. We went to information sessions at 3 of them before we decided, and our choice was based on "fit" - the type of adoption we were seeking and the personality and approach of the agency. We also had talked to people who had adopted through each agency before making our final choice.

Good luck!