[anilorak13ska]

I was told that a calling = a desire + opportunities. I assumed that we were called to adopt based on the desire of my heart. But after 4 years of pursuing adoption (domestic, foster, international), I started to question if God really wanted us to adopt at all. Then last month, the door was permanently shut with a situation I'd rather not go into that pretty much prevents us from being able to ever pass another homestudy. Therefore, all future opportunities to adopt have been removed, right? Therefore, we can no longer say that God is calling us to adopt, right? He may have called us THROUGH adoption, but not TO it. ... Unless the only kind of adoption He wants me to really focus on is embryo adoption?

I am discerning if God is calling us to a childfree life. I'm trying this lifestyle on as we are on hold awaiting our second transfer of our last two adopted embryos. I'm wondering what our next step may be if our Pixie Stix don't stick. I know I need to just wait and see, so I'm just trying to be open to the possibilities.

[wcurry66]

*hugs*

I'm not a religious person, but I can empathize. 20 years ago, I truly felt we had exhausted all options for us. I went through the grief - the anger, frustration, and mourning

What helped most, from a healing perspective, was to figure out what "I" was meant to be. If I wasn't meant to be a mom, there must be another purpose for my life, right? otherwise, my life was over at age 23.

If you aren't meant to be a mom.. or, as you wrote, "God is calling us to a childfree life".. what IS the plan? What might you contribute that you might otherwise not be able to do if you had a kid?

Is there a way you can use your experiences to help others?

Good luck on your journey

[anilorak13ska]

Thanks, yes, that's what I'm trying to do, see what it is that I should be doing. Becoming a mom was almost like the easy answer, easy in theory!

Originally Posted by wcurry66

*hugs*

I'm not a religious person, but I can empathize. 20 years ago, I truly felt we had exhausted all options for us. I went through the grief - the anger, frustration, and mourning

What helped most, from a healing perspective, was to figure out what "I" was meant to be. If I wasn't meant to be a mom, there must be another purpose for my life, right? otherwise, my life was over at age 23.

If you aren't meant to be a mom.. or, as you wrote, "God is calling us to a childfree life".. what IS the plan? What might you contribute that you might otherwise not be able to do if you had a kid?

Is there a way you can use your experiences to help others?

Good luck on your journey

[millie58]

I'm so sorry. Are you sure you're closed to adoption??

[anilorak13ska]

sent you a PM

[millie58]

I answered you.

[CaddoRose]

I have a personal take on fate, or God's plan, or whatever each person may call it. I like to say that I don't swim upstream. I believe that doors open or close for us based on what we are suppose to be doing with our lives and it's up to us to decide whether to walk trough the door or walk away from the closed door. It's up to each of us to work out what we think we need to do with our lives in order to be happy and to fulfill our destiny here on earth. Sometimes what may appear from all angles to be a closed door, can infact open again at a future point. I say this because there are very few things that could cause you to never be able to pass a HS again. I hope you are able to come to a peaceful resolution for yourslef on what this all means for your future.