[Smith44]

Well, we went to court and we will be going back again in January. Can anyone tell me how often stepparent adoptions do not go threw? I know that we have a strong case, but I like to prepare myself for the worst. I know that the bf contested out of spite. I hope that the attorney that was appointed to him tells him that it is in the children's best interest if he consents. He hasn't seen, spoken to, or paid support in just about three years. He is not financially stable and he does not even live in the same state. I was told that we will go back to court in a month and if he doesn’t consent, we will go to trial. I am just worried and I want what is best for my children.
Thanks!

[Kallen330]

Just because the other parent contests does not mean that the adoption will not go through.

Everyone panics when the other parent contests. What needs to be kept in mind is that the contesting parent must prove that adoption is not in the best interest of the child(ren) involved. If the opposing parent has not had contact, provided support, or has been convicted of a felonious crime, has a serious drug and/or alcohol problem, mental illness to the degree that they are incapable of parenting, or has abused, neglected, or failed to protect the child(ren), these are all reasons for a stepparent adoption to go through. The opposing parent must disprove this stuff. If the evidence is overwhelmingly against them then you can breathe a lot easier. Of course, it is never over until it is over but, your chances are much better you will prevail.

Remember that these judges, attorneys, and social workers handle these type of cases EVERYDAY. So they get the opposing parents number real quick. There are very, very, few acceptable excuses for abandoning your child. Being in a coma for the past year or two is probably one of them. Just not feeling like picking up the phone, or writing a letter, or making time to visit, these excuses do not fly in court.

So, if you feel your case is solid, take a couple of deep breaths and try to not worry yourself to a frazzle before the next hearing.

Good Luck!

[Smith44]

Kallen,

Thank you very much for your encouraging words, they do help. It is nice to know that others have been in similar situations and have advice to give. I am a little worried too, because the county that I am in has two new judges that will be hearing cases come the new year. From what people say it can be good or bad. The bottom line is that the law is the law and here in CA it is one year of no contact or one year of no support and in our case, we have both.