[KevNickJ6680]

Hello- just a quick post for anyone able to offer information that would help us. My mother is very interested in adoption, but has a major concern that directly involves myself. When I was a little less than a year old, I was left with a baby sitter who's husband was quite the alcoholic. While in the sitters care, her husband broke my leg. Since the husband was an abusive alcoholic, the sitter insinuated that my leg was broken prior to my being dropped off at their house (just to keep the husband from being charged). My parents were subjected to months and months of intense investigation by CPS. My parents were charged with Child Endangerment/Neglect. Due to the length of the investigation/trial, my mother could not afford an attorney, and had no other choice but to plead No Contest. Custody was immediately reinstated to my mother, but this charge still hung over her head. She is wondering if this situation would prevent her from adopting a child now, and just isn't sure how to get an answer to this question. Any help/information is greatly appreciated. Thank you.

[daveandmina]

I think because it's a crime against a child her chances of being approved are poor. However if your mom's heart is really into this I would suggest just applying and seeing what happens. She should definetely disclose the incident. Especially since it will show up on the criminal background check. DSS hates surprises. Your mom will have an opportunity to explain herself and the situation and then it's up to DSS to decide what to do.
Good luck!

[takingtheplunge]

Wow. Your email brings many thoughts to my mind. First, you sound very articulate; thus, I am assuming you are 17+ which makes me wonder why your mom wants another baby, which is obviously none of my business. However, rest assured that the county will question motive to adopt. Further, the past will come back and there will be questions to answer.

The following is a brief story about what I was questioned about:
In my g-ma's care, a construction worker exposed himself to me and asked me to touch his privates. She had hired him to install a tree swing for me. At the time, I told on him and we filed a report against the guy, but dropped charges after he was put back in jail for violated parole. We never formally prosecuted b/c the cops told my parents that it would be too hard for me to be on a stand and testify.

Anyway, I forgot about this incident and never mentioned it when I was interviewed by the county. However, later during PRIDE classes, the county worker asked me if i was ever sexually assaulted. I said no, but he kept asking. Then, I remembered the swing incident. They said they consider it assault even though I wasn't touched. They proceeded to question why my grandma wasn't watching me closer. They then asked me how she met the guy, etc. By the end of the questioning, I felt as if they were worried about my grandma's judgment which could affect me. I assured them she is in a nursing home now and would not be watching our adopted child. Actually, it made me sad b/c I know my grandma loved me lots, especially to install a swing just for me.

In the end, I had to write a one page report about it, and it went in my file. They said it would not affect me adopting, but if the assaulter was a friend or relative, then it would.

It still shocks me that they had a record of this incident even though we didn't prosecute him.

So, to answer your question, yes. They will definitely question why she left the child with a known alcoholic. They will question the timeframe in which is was reported.

[amymlc]

This now has me worried. I asked the social worker if growing up in foster care would make it difficult for me to foster/adopt and she assured me it wouldn't, but now I'm worried it will. My bio family is insane (mother and siblings are mentally ill and drug addicts. Sadly I'm the only one who has managed to get my life in order) and I have nothing to do with them anymore. They are constantly in trouble and my brother recently got a lot of attention nationally for his actions. Will this affect my fostering/adopting? I guess I will have to wait and see.

[Happy123]

As I see it, your background would be beneficial because you can relate to what a foster child is going thru. I can see them wanting to make sure that you have dealt w/ your past emotionally. Plus, how you currently deal w/ your family.
I personally know that my first foster child's mother is now a foster parent herself (her child was in care 7 years ago) and doing well. Going thru the process was not easy, but she stuck to it.
Good Luck,
Happy123