[takingtheplunge]

Hello. We are cert. for fost/adopt. We don't need the $ from AAP to make our ends meet; however, I am pleased that this assistance can help build a college fund, offer medical and some money for counselling.

Here is my question: we may be in a situation where a child is "relinquished" to us. This child was previously in foster care for five months but is back w/ parent. This child was born drug exposed. Our county offers AAP in normal foster/adopt situations. I read the document about AAP elgibilty at http://www.cdss.ca.gov/cdssweb/entre...glish/AAP4.PDF

It appears that I could check "yes" to the question about the parent's adverse lifestyle/medical. However, the other eligiblilty question has to do with search for non-subsidy placement. On one hand, if the parent is relinquishing to me specifically and I agree to adopt, then I can't check this box, can I? Is there a way around this?

For the kid to get medical and AAP, would the parent be better off abandoning the kid with us, and then we can take him in under "guardianship" an then agree to adopt through the county? Would the kid get AAP then?

I don't want it to sound as if money is driving our decision to adopt this possible relinquishment. It's our dream come true. That said, I know for a fact the kid was born drug exposed, and it is still so young that I don't know what probs may come up. Having the AAP could help with needs of the child and build for its future.

Please if anyone can understand what I am asking, let me know what I should do. Either way, the parent wants to not be a parent anymore and the person trusts us with the kid. So, should I suggest private adoption, county relinquishment to us, or to abandon it at our house and apply for guardianship? Can the parent face criminal charges for abandonment if they leave it with a good home? I would not want that.

Thanks in advance for your advice to an akward question.

[mommytoEli]

to qualify for aap, at some point, the child has to be a ward of the court. even then, they will tell you in CA, that it is possible for a child to not qualify. if the parent is placing with you directly, then you won't qualify. if you are suggesting they abandon their child with you, then you are asking them to do something illegal. mom could end up in jail, and the county could choose to take the baby from you, and send him to be fostered elsewhere. just bc a baby is left with you, doesn't mean you will get to adopt him. it is my opinion that the only legal and ethical option you have, if you want the child, is to do a private adoption, which means you will get no assistance.

[crick]

As the previous poster stated, if you are asking mom to abandon, that is illegal. We cannot and do not support illegal activities on our site. If you are looking for legal options, please feel free to discuss.

[takingtheplunge]

No, Crick, I don't want to ask the parent to do any think illegal. As mentioned, I would not want the parent to get in trouble. This is why I asked this forum for advice !

The facts are that the parent claims to not want to not be a parent anymore. So in one hand, they are choosing to abandon. The question is just when, where and how.

We just know the kid might need therapy later on, so we thought if there could be a way to adopt and get AAP, we would suggest it to the parent.

As it stands, we've decided to get a lawyer for formal advice on the difference in guardianship, relinquishment or private adoption. We do want to do right by the law and child's welfare.

Who knows, the parent could be playing us or another family member could step forward. I know one of the parent's siblings is against the parent's decision. I will know soon if this is all b.s.

For now, I am hoping our hearts and home will soon be blessed with the pitter patter of little feet.