[kamari]

We just attended the SD county orientation meeting last week. Unfortunately, we ultimately decided not to pursue a foster care adoption (for multiple reasons), but we were intrigued by what the speaker said about a "voluntary relinquishment" adoption process. He didn't, however, go into that much detail and since we were really there to learn about the foster care adoption process, I didn't think to ask more questions at the time. Now I'm trying to find more info on it and not having an easy time.

Specifically:
Do you need a foster care license for this sort of adoption process (like they strongly recommend for the foster care adoptions for ease of immediate placement)?

What are common reasons birth parents choose voluntary relinquishment?

Do we typically know much about the child's medical history/condition and/or family background with this sort of situation?

etc. etc.

If anyone else knows the answers or where I can find the answers, I'd appreciate it.

Thanks!
-K

ETA: The speaker said ONLY "infants" were permitted to be voluntarily relinquished and that the birth parent(s) get to choose the adoptive family and that the child is never a "dependent of the state" in this situation. Other than that, I know nothing.

[mommytoEli]

i can tell you what i learned about them in riverside county....one county over....and i bet is very similar. in riverside yes, you must become a licensed fost/adopt home...so you still go through all the classes. parents typically relinquish at the hospital when they decide then and there they want an adoption plan for their child. cps is contacted, and they bring several profiles to the parents to choose from. because these children are placed right after birth, they do not become wards of the state, so it functions more as a typical adoption- no subsidy, but a faster finalization. i imagine youd get a lot of information about family because they are a part of the process.

[RavenSong]

I voluntarily relinquished through the County of San Diego back in the 1970's. And, yes, it's my understanding that DSS's Department of Adoptions still offers this type of adoption there. They have a pretty nice website that talks about voluntary relinquishment of newborns, just in case you haven't seen it.

Back in the 1970's the County was often used as an adoption agency, back before the days of CPS. I had a couple friends in high school who also went thru them to voluntarily surrender their newborn infants. There were only two other agencies at that time in the San Diego area of which I was aware: Catholic Charities and Children's Home Society. Nowadays, I'm sure there a many agencies from which to choose.

As an expectant mother and years later as a soon-to-be reunited birthmother, I was treated with a lot of respect and kindness. The caseworkers in the post-adoptions division are for the most part fantastic, even if they are overworked and underpaid.

I first went to the County's Department of Adoptions when I was about 7 months pregnant. I knew I just couldn't financially support my baby. (I was 16 years old, soon to be 17.) There weren't near as many assistance programs back then, but I imagine the financial aspect is still a huge factor in the relinquishment decision. Nowadays, I understand that the department provides extensive counseling to the emoms, and also goes over all possible options and available assistance programs if finances are the core issue. The counseling is continued after the adoption, although I don't know for how long. (I do know that the County provides post-adoption counseling for bmoms who request it, even if many years have lapsed. I received some excellent counseling and "debriefing" from their post-adoptions caseworker for about a year before my son and I were reunited.)

All in all, I give San Diego County a "thumbs up".

P.S. In regards to medical and social history, the County operates pretty much the same as all adoption agencies. They sit down with emoms and go over all medical history, psych history, social backgrounds, ethnic heritages, etc. They even did this back in the "dark ages" before it was really known just how important having a medical history is.

[kamari]

I don't see the page where they speak of voluntary relinquishment. I would really appreciate a link, if you could. Also I really want to thank you for sharing your story. It's always so interesting to hear the other side of things. :-)
Thanks!

[Alpinemaps]

karami,

I'd certainly be interested in hearing why you chose not to go through county adoptions. My wife and I are also looking to do a newborn adoption, and your desire sound similar to ours.

I know we came out of there a little disappointed with the way things were presented in the county orientation program, but decided to go ahead and see it through, since it's one of the avenues we're exploring.

We're going through the PRIDE Classes now, and what a difference! The people we have running the PRIDE classes are very good, and really reenergized us about the process.

Don't let one orientation session discourage you. I'm not saying the PRIDE classes are perfect, since we're looking for the newborn adoption, and not to foster (and some of the material is geared toward that), but the classes are fantastic regardless, and will make you feel a bit better about the process.

For us, one reason we're getting licensed because we do want to make placement easier. Why not do everything we can to make it as easy as possible?

[kamari]

While the specific reasons are personal and I'd rather not discuss them online, I can tell you it wasn't a matter of not liking the presentation or of being intimidated by the process. It was more to do with certain policies that were explained during the orientation which we were not previously aware of.

I'm delighted to hear that you are moving forward with your county adoption. I think it's a wonderful program and a great fit for many families, and I wish you the best of luck!

[Alpinemaps]

Originally Posted by kamari

While the specific reasons are personal and I'd rather not discuss them online, I can tell you it wasn't a matter of not liking the presentation or of being intimidated by the process. It was more to do with certain policies that were explained during the orientation which we were not previously aware of.

I'm delighted to hear that you are moving forward with your county adoption. I think it's a wonderful program and a great fit for many families, and I wish you the best of luck!

No problem, and thanks for sharing. I just wanted to make sure that wasn't the reason, because it weighed on us heavily. Like I said, we had wet noodles, and they were discouraging, but we are far more encouraged now.

[Socal_mama]

The reason they want you to get your foster care license is so that you can bring the baby home right away. If you don't have your license (and approved home) then they can't place the baby in your care while they do all the paperwork..
Thats my understanding of it..

[Alpinemaps]

Originally Posted by Socal_mama

The reason they want you to get your foster care license is so that you can bring the baby home right away. If you don't have your license (and approved home) then they can't place the baby in your care while they do all the paperwork..
Thats my understanding of it..

Yep - that's my understanding too.

In our case, we are definitely trying to a newborn, so we're loading up on doing whatever we can to give ourselves the best chance.