[thesearchguru]

It’s important to be prepared for all outcomes before you make contact. You can do that by preparing yourself before contact by being knowledgeable about all issues involved in search and reunion. Talk to other adoptees and birth parents by joining an on-line chat room or a face-to-face in a support group in your area.

On-line chat room: http://www.adoptionchat.com

Face-to face support groups: http://www.cubirthparents.org/

(email this group on their website and they can let you know if there is a support group in your area and the meeting time and place.)

It is recommended that you read some of the many great books that are available on relinquishment, adoption, search and reunion issues. Here is a list that might be helpful:

RECOMMENDED READING LIST FOR ADOPTION ISSUES
“Birthmothers: Woman Who Have Relinquished Babies for Adoption Tell Their Stories”
…by Merry Bloch Jones

“Twice Born: Memoirs of an Adopted Daughter”
A true story of an adoptee’s search for her birth family. Lifton has given us a story of mothering and mother-loss, attachment and bonding, secrets and lies, and the human need for origins.
…by B. J. Lifton

“Ithaka”
An adopted daughter’s memoirs of being found by her birth parents who had married after the relinquishment and had 3 more children – A good “what not to do” guide for birthparents searching for their relinquished birth child
…by Sarah Saffian

“Journey of the Adopted Self: A Quest for Wholeness”
Lifton addresses the myths surrounding adoption. This book delves into psychological effects of adoption.
…by B. J. Lifton

“Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child” ***HIGHLY RECOMMENDED***
A widely read book about adoptees written by an adoptive mother and therapist who raised an adopted daughter and a biological daughter.
…by Nancy Verrier (can order book at http://www.primalwound.com)
(Note: order directly from Nancy at 919 Village Center, Lafayette, CA 94549. $14.95 plus $3.00 shipping and handling)

“A Man and His Mother: An Adopted Son’s Search”
Fox-TV Sports host and bestselling author tells of his search for his mother that he never knew.
…by Tim Green

“Courageous Blessings: Adoptive Parents and the Search”. A great book to give adoptive parents who support their adopted children in their search for their birth family.
…by Carol L. Dumuth (Can be ordered from Aires Center, 1437 Meandering, Garland, TX 75040 (214) 414-3639 or call Carol at 972-414-3639

“Of Unknown Origin: A Memoir”
A daughter finds her birthmother but also finds rejection and denial.
…by Debra Levi Holtz ISBN 1-57178-100-5


California Search Website:





Other great websites to check out!
http://www.adoptionchat.com
http://www.adoptionlists.com
http://www.adoption.com
http://www.adopting.org
http://www.adoptionregistry.com