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Old 09-25-2011, 07:46 PM
rd200 rd200 is offline
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Should BF'ing be a deal breaker?

So, I induced lactation when we adopted our son 10 months ago. I did it last minute and never really produced a whole lotta milk. But i used the Lact-aid with relative success (altho i will say it was ALOT of work to keep up with it after i went back to work)
Now we are thinking of doing the donor embie route and the ONLY reason i would do that over adopting again is because i want to breastfeed. I want to breastfeed with all the natural hormones, milk production, etc. Is that a really silly reason not to adopt, because i want to have the whole experience with breastfeeding??
Dont get me wrong, the bonding and everything was wonderful with my Ason and im sooooo glad i did it, but I would love love love to do it after actually having the baby myself. It sounds so foolish to risk IF treatments over the guarantee of adoption "JUST" because I want the WHOLE experience of breastfeeding. Im just not sure what to do and how to work through what i want to do..... thanks for listening. -Rach
Married DH and had a handsome son

Adoption journey took 2 years, but was
well worth the wait. Welcomed home a
precious baby boy. Now a family of 4!!!

Pursuing embryo adoption to complete
our family!!!
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Old 10-07-2011, 05:51 PM
noelani2 noelani2 is offline
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I actually think a lot of us have the same drive to want to give birth and breast feed without having to supplement and do all of the extra things we do. We actually started looking into more infertility treatment between several of our kids, although we still had the adoption option open, too. Each time, we ended up with an opportunity to adopt another baby. I wanted to be pregnant, but wanting to be able to lactate naturally was probably the biggest part of it. I was actually hoping to have one and then adopt another fairly soon after and tandem nurse. I still wish I could have done that, at least once, but I wouldn't trade any of my kids for anyone I might have given birth to.

I think this is the kind of thing where you need to follow your own heart and try not to be concerned with what anyone else might think. Best wishes on whatever you decide!

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Old 10-07-2011, 06:21 PM
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HappyTwinsMom HappyTwinsMom is offline
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If breastfeeding is that important to you and something you really want to do, then you should take the route that will allow you to do it. Everyone has different reasons for getting pregnant or adopting. For us, DH and I were not that invested in the pregnancy and delivery aspect; we just wanted to be Mom and Dad. So after doing a limited round of infertility treatment, we moved on to adoption.

It was the right decision for us and one I've never regretted. But I would never say that it would be right decision for everyone. You need to know what you want and go after it.

By the way, good luck!
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Old 10-07-2011, 07:59 PM
usisarah usisarah is offline
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I say just go with your heart. If it's that important to you, do your research and make sure you're prepared for embryo adoption and what goes along with that and do it.

I would suggest you look into all aspects of embryo out people that were conceived that way and get their opinions/feelings on their conception, for example. Find out what things some people conceived in this way find important about their story. You have an open adoption with your son...think about whether or not you can/should seek an open relationship with embryo donors if you do decide to go that route, etc. Good luck.
"Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence." - Robert Frost
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