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  #1  
Old 08-16-2007, 05:10 PM
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Using breasts to pacify, not feed

Hey everyone. I can't breastfeed because of some medication I'm taking; I did have some milk but it is mostly dried up.

I was carrying our one month older the other day naked as I was taking him to dh so I could take a shower and he latched right on to my breast and it brought back such fond memories of when I breastfed my bio son that I just let him suck to his heart's content.

Is this wrong? After he unlatched I checked to make sure he hadn't taken any milk and there was none on my nipple, in his mouth, and I never heard him swallow like he was taking in any. I felt so close to him and he latched so well...like he wasn't bottle fed at all.

Is it wrong? Couldn't I just be a pacifier?

Blessings, Michelle
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  #2  
Old 08-16-2007, 05:23 PM
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I don't know if it's wrong persay, but certainly not uhm...usual? I do think based on your last few posts though that you might have a serious bout of depression and this isn't likely helping.

If breastfeeding is that important to you and it's a factor in your depression as you've stated before, I don't think this is a wise idea at all. Have you spoken to anyone about your depression? A therapist?
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  #3  
Old 08-16-2007, 08:11 PM
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First off, I would like to thank you for making me feel even more like a crazy person. I am truly depressed now. Yes, I do see a therapist, yes, I do have a psychiatrist...wanna know why? Because I am bipolar!

Why did you have to make me sound so crazy publicly like this...why couldn't you have sent me a PM?

Breastfeeding was my whole world with my bio son; what is wrong with letting my adopted son suck on my teat just once? I haven't done it since and just wanted a basic opinion...I really don't appreciate the way you worded your post, Crick!

I read your response after reading my post to my hubby and he told me to completely ignore you...I am already depressed, now I feel crazy for even coming here for support...yeah, support! Was your post supportive??? Do you really think it would strike me as supportive when you posted it?

Blessings, Michelle
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1 ds from prev. marriage, 11 y.o. (Bradley)
M/C twins, Sept. '06
Adoption proceedings started
Homestudy started Jan. '07
Matched via adoption atty April '07
Michael Joshua Dale (Josh) born July 9th,
Placed in our arms July 11th, 2007
Finalized Nov. 26th, 2007!
www.totsites.com/tot/joshiedale
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  #4  
Old 08-16-2007, 08:27 PM
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Michelle,

You asked for an opinion, one was offered. Based on your follow up post, it sounds like you weren't really wanting an opinion, you were wanting justification or to be told it was ok.

I'm sorry that you aren't happy with the response you got, but you asked for opinions and that is what you got.

Please don't attack others when they've only responded with what you asked for, which was their opinion. Agree or disagree, that's fine...
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Old 08-16-2007, 08:47 PM
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Mondk,

No you are not crazy. You are a wonderful mother and don't let anyone suggest otherwise. Good for you for standing up for yourself.

Breastfeeding is a VERY powerful motherly desire for some and you have every right to want to breastfeed your son...and there is NOTHING wrong with you wanting to pacify him with the breast either.

I will pm you and try and help you come up with some ideas of how to go about this safely with your little one.
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  #6  
Old 08-16-2007, 09:41 PM
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Hmm...let me try again then....

I do think that in light of your depression, putting so much validation of motherhood into breastfeeding might not be helpful to you in trying to bond with your child. There are so many ways to bond with your new son and breastfeeding is just one way.

Post Adoption depression is very real, and I believe it's important to address it, which is why I asked if you had discussed it with a therapist. I think that's a valid question to ask since a lot of women do not get help when experiencing PADS.

I didn't say you were crazy or that your feelings were invalid at all. I’m sorry you took it that way.
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  #7  
Old 08-16-2007, 09:53 PM
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I'm sorry too; I don't know what is wrong with me tonight. I had had such a good day today and then tonight I just sort of fell apart.

Brandy: You are totally right; I asked for an opinion and I got one, I just didn't agree with the way it was worded. I know all you mods stick together so I guess I will just slink off into a corner and become invisible again.

Blessings, Michelle
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1 ds from prev. marriage, 11 y.o. (Bradley)
M/C twins, Sept. '06
Adoption proceedings started
Homestudy started Jan. '07
Matched via adoption atty April '07
Michael Joshua Dale (Josh) born July 9th,
Placed in our arms July 11th, 2007
Finalized Nov. 26th, 2007!
www.totsites.com/tot/joshiedale
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  #8  
Old 08-16-2007, 10:05 PM
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Hi,

I would ask your psychiatrist at your next meeting what his/her opinion is on breastfeeding.
I know that it's not a good idea to get pregnant while on certain medications as it can cause birth defects in the baby, but I dont know about breastfeeding.
I have heard that it's still not recommended if one is on medications, but to me, the baby is already formed , so my guess is that the baby may only feel a bit drowsy after drinking. I wouldnt think you'd have to worry about it really affecting all the systems of your baby's body.
However, I am a lay person, and it's just my assumption. Please check it out with your doctor. Maybe you'll get lucky and he/she will say you can breastfeed your child now and then on the medication. I dont know. I wish you luck.
Amy K, NJ
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  #9  
Old 08-23-2007, 12:25 PM
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joelynn joelynn is offline
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Our daughter was almost 4 months old when she was placed with us. She had been abandoned in the hospital by her bmom and then placed in one of our agency's foster homes. I had read it helped with bonding to breastfeed but don't ask me where I read that...can't remember. I never did produce any real milk but I let her latch on when trying to put her to sleep at night...in the privacy of her nursery...anyway we did this for a month or two and then when she was no longer interested I stopped. I had breastfed my bio son but apparently it had been too long and I never did get the milk production going. It was alright though she seemed to be satisfied.
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