[TOWANDA]

7/18/1973
Childs Name Carmen Louise Nichol
Place of birth and details of adoption I named you Carmen Louise Nichol. Carmen was your father's mother’s name and Louise is my Mother's middle name. Both your Grandfather's have passed away. Your father is probably still insane. I don't see his mother any more as he makes my life crazy. He just never got his act together. My mother is now 83 in 2004 and living with us. She is quite frail.
You were born in Montreal, Quebec at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital 10:06 am. 5lbs 4 ozs of sweetness and light. I don't have much to remember you by except your birth picture and a few baby bottles I snagged from your feedings. My, you were beautiful.
Adoption arranged through Ville Marie Social Services now known as Batshaw. Batshaw notified of my desire for contact at birth and then again just before your 18th birthday 13 years ago. Batshaw claimed overwork had a backlog of searches but I would eventually come to the top of the pile. I have not yet reached the top. I now live in the US. I search the sites regularly looking for you but there does not seem to be any trace of you searching. Perhaps you were never told you were adopted and that I loved you very much and did not have any choice at the time but to place you with new parent s that could give the things I could not. I was told you were adopted by two teachers in Westmount. I hope you have had a great life because if it was only so so, you could have stayed with me. I married late (38) to an absolutely wonderful man named Phil. You will adore him as well, I am sure. Everyone does. I am truly blessed with only one thing missing.....knowing you and the wonderful people who raised you. Where are you and why aren't you looking for me? Each year passes with my wondering what you are up to, what you think and do now. I have never had any other children but you have some cousins who are really great. I have three sisters, Dale, Jennifer, and Heather. Two brothers, Gavin and Chris. Please get in touch.
Cat

[Kellster]

Hi Cat,

I am here in Montreal and have a bit of search experience from finding my friend's birthmother. "Two teachers from Westmount" does not give me much to work with. Do you have any other information? If there is anything I can look up for you, please feel free to post or pm me.

Good luck!

Kelly

[TOWANDA]

Kelly,
My username has changed to TOWANDA. (Fried Green Tomatoes war cry for the hormonaly challenged) I believe this is the year I will be in contact with my daughter!

It is sweet of you to offerto help. I have some info but am going to forgo the sleuth role for the moment. What I need to do first is call Batshaw. They have more than likely dropped the ball.
I left a letter for my daughter 31 years ago explaining the situation and my desire for contact when she was ready.
I need to find out if she ever got the letter. I also had requested her non-identifying info many years ago but never received it. I think living in the US has presented a roadblock for Batshaw. I guess the extra postage would cause them a great hardship.
They are basically using my child as leverage and at this point I feel like I have put my principles before my child. They told me 13 years ago that they had a backlog of cases but would eventually get to my file. They asked at the time if I would be willing to pay them as it might go faster. That really ticked me off and I said I was a patient person and could wait till they cleared their backlog. Well, here we are, 13 years later and they still have not found time to do thier job. It fries my butt! However, at this point I think it is time to put aside my indignance and pay them the ransom. I have heard that once you do, things happen quickly. Just a matter of months. My mother (83) is living with us now and is not going to last forever. She was with me when Carmen was born and I really want them to meet each other befor it is too late. I will try to get to Batshaw this week with at least a phone call. I am hesitant to check out the family who may have adopted her as I really do not want to intrude and believe it is Carmen's choice to contact me or not. I guess I have just assumed all these years she has chosen not to and will be muffed if I find out Batshaw never told her I wanted to meet her.
Again thanks for the offer to help.
Cat

[Kellster]

Hi Cat,

You are welcome and the offer stands if at any point I can help you. I know that many people have had a hard time getting Batshaw to move on their files. I hope that the payment idea helps move things along for you.

I have a very deep respect for you putting your daughter's feelings before your own- I know that that is what a mother's love means, but never having been a birthmom, I can only imagine the strength it takes to do that in this case. I hope that your situation works out wonderfully for everyone concerned.

Please don't hesitate to post/pm if there is anything I can do to help from here

Best of luck!

Kelly

[TOWANDA]

I received a call from the Searcher at the agency in Montreal yesterday. Unfortunately I was in with a client and couldn't take the call.
Either she was calling to let me know they are ready to begin the search or who knows maybe they found her.

Keep your fingers crossed everyone, will keep you posted

Cat

Originally Posted by TOWANDA

7/18/1973
Childs Name Carmen Louise Nichol
Place of birth and details of adoption I named you Carmen Louise Nichol. Carmen was your father's mother’s name and Louise is my Mother's middle name. Both your Grandfather's have passed away. Your father is probably still insane. I don't see his mother any more as he makes my life crazy. He just never got his act together. My mother is now 83 in 2004 and living with us. She is quite frail.
You were born in Montreal, Quebec at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital 10:06 am. 5lbs 4 ozs of sweetness and light. I don't have much to remember you by except your birth picture and a few baby bottles I snagged from your feedings. My, you were beautiful.
Adoption arranged through Ville Marie Social Services now known as Batshaw. Batshaw notified of my desire for contact at birth and then again just before your 18th birthday 13 years ago. Batshaw claimed overwork had a backlog of searches but I would eventually come to the top of the pile. I have not yet reached the top. I now live in the US. I search the sites regularly looking for you but there does not seem to be any trace of you searching. Perhaps you were never told you were adopted and that I loved you very much and did not have any choice at the time but to place you with new parent s that could give the things I could not. I was told you were adopted by two teachers in Westmount. I hope you have had a great life because if it was only so so, you could have stayed with me. I married late (38) to an absolutely wonderful man named Phil. You will adore him as well, I am sure. Everyone does. I am truly blessed with only one thing missing.....knowing you and the wonderful people who raised you. Where are you and why aren't you looking for me? Each year passes with my wondering what you are up to, what you think and do now. I have never had any other children but you have some cousins who are really great. I have three sisters, Dale, Jennifer, and Heather. Two brothers, Gavin and Chris. Please get in touch.
Cat