[m-mom]

Is this normal?
When ever i'm missing my b-son and have a cocktail in my system I cry and cry and cry and cant stop, until I go to sleep.
For instance, the other night I went to dinner with my hubby's family and they have an adopted little girl. I could barely look at her! It made me think of my son, And then that night, the tears...

When ever i'm thinking about contacting him, or a visit is coming up I lose it.

After 10 years shouldnt i be coping better?

[JustPeachy]

Everyone copes differently, but I think counseling is a good idea. If you are questioning it, you probably could use some help. Even if you cope well overall, issues can come up, and getting counseling can offer ways to put things in perspective. Have you gotten counseling at all in the last 10 years?

[thanksgivingmom]

I am a big fan of the theory that EVERYONE could use a little counseling for something or other. We're always works in progress I tend to think that I cope pretty well, but recently I've come to realize that I just DENY really well and bottle things up.

[Jackiejdajda]

To me a counselor is like a guide.. Someone you can talk with and work on what is upsetting you..

So yes a counselor is a good thing..

Also I learned that stuffing your grief does not work.. when you feel like crying cry..

Jackie

[SchmennaLeigh]

As a default, catch-all answer:

If you're asking the question, "Do I need counseling," the answer is almost always, "Yes." (And not speaking solely of birth parents but just about anyone!)

The ebb and flow of emotion can catch us off guard at times. You are, at ten years out, perhaps experiencing an ebb. It can't hurt to talk to someone to put these emotions in some sort of perspective.

Hang in.

[jp4ga]

How old is the adopted child you could not look at: is this a new situation or a child close to the age of your son. This could be a factor in why you were upset. I don't think anyone ever heals from placing a child. You will always miss him, and it is okay to cry. I think counseling is a good idea and would not hurt, it may help.

Best wishes to you.