[SchmennaLeigh]

Do you dream about your child? Not just daydreaming, but middle-of-the-night kind of dreams.

Are they good? Or bad? Scary? Or hopeful? Share.

[Free_to_be_me]

I had a few dreams about my birthdaughter when she was very small. The one I remember most was that I was driving along and was in a car accident. As people were pulling me out of the car, I started panicking and yelling about the baby in the car. (It was always "the baby," not her name, not my baby...) The rescuers would search the car for the carseat and baby and couldn't ever find it. As someone was trying to explain very calmly that they couldn't find the baby or her seat, I would realize that I didn't have her. The dream kind of disturbed me, but it went away after the first 6 months or so.

[bromanchik]

I've always had dreams of losing him... in many different ways.

[taramayrn]

I used to have this recurring dream that I was baby sitting (I think) T and someone would steal him from me. I could never find him.

[SchmennaLeigh]

Verrrrrrrrrry interesting.

[browneyes0707]

I've had a lot of dreams about DD over the years, though I can't recall exactly most of them from years ago. But I love to dream about her, those are the dreams that you wake up from an you try to go back to sleep and pick up from where the dream left off, just so you can spend 5 more min in that world.

The more recent ones that I would have since I found her were similar, and involved me going to her home (they live about 400 miles from me) not to see her, but it was either that I would have to talk to her a-mom or it was one of those where suddenly she lived in my area and all my friends knew her family and I would have interaction with her a-mom, but we were always hiding from DD or talking in shushed voices. DD would come home or come down the stairs and walk right by me because she didn't know who I was, as her and her a-mom would exchange scared glances that she would put two and two together, and I would always want to tell her who I was but a-mom would not make the first move.

I remember hearing back in school when I was a kid that dreams were a composite of whatever was on your mind scattered with various things that happened throughout the day. So if you were thinking , say, about your aunt and the christmas holiday and while you were running errands that day you got pulled over , you might dream about running around doing christmas errands and a cop pulled you over but it was really your aunt, KWIM?

So for me the fact that I've had dreams like this lately doesn't surprise me,as it mirrors my situation.

[lahdh4]

I always tend to start dreaming of her and a few days later I will get pictures. It is really weird since I get pictures that are not on any sort of schedule so now when they start I know to start going to check my mail more often then I normally would.
Before that it was I would have a dream of her crying and come to find out she was having a bad night and would wake up crying.

[Marimar]

hi
I have different idea on dreams.
There are many types of dreams. Some of them my come from subconcious but some of them are real..

You can really visit someone in your dream and it is a reality . I know that I visit some of my friends. They visit me. it is just a matter of learning how to do.

I always had problems with my brother. I have not talked with him since 2003 but when he is happy or in trouble with something for ex classes, ilness etc. I see him in my dream. I dont really think about him everyday but I just know how he is.

Once ,in my dream I saw that he had lost all of his hair in that dream he was a child and I was preparing egg for him. That time, I had asked my mother how my brother is and she sad that he was ill and he had hard time with one of his classes.

I am not an adoptee but my parents did not approved my husband and for years we did not see each other. I only talked with my aunt.

I did saw them in my dreams or when I was just sitting
I sometimes saw them in the walls :P.. I could talk with them and right away I knew that they heard me. My aunt, then was telling me in the phone "you know your mother saw you in her dream you said "... " , I knew beforhand because that was not a dream.

One thing which is still difficult is feeling their pain and hurt so much and not being able to change it. Thier anger and pain really freezes me. it was a constant feeling coming from them.
Being so emphatetic has that consequience I guess. until they let me go , I was really imprisioned.

The motherday and the holidays we used to celebrate was hard for me. But it was not my pain I felt. it was theirs.

Anyways

Your children do feel you.
You may really know even in a closed adoption what is going on in your childs life.

[thanksgivingmom]

last night i dreamt that i was in a room with some friends and that there was a door that opened to a long hallway. I saw Ava being carried by her amom and followed by the SW...i have not yet met D (amom) and was so surprised to see the two of them that i ran to the hall and called out her name. she didnt turn around but instead pulled Ava closer and rushed away down the hall. The SW turned to me and gestured for me to stay where I was before she turned back and rushed away as well.

i didnt like it.

[bromanchik]

Originally Posted by thanksgivingmom

i ran to the hall and called out her name. she didnt turn around but instead pulled Ava closer and rushed away down the hall. The SW turned to me and gestured for me to stay where I was before she turned back and rushed away as well.

i didnt like it.

Wow! Can I ask where you are in setting up contact with the adoptive mom?

[thanksgivingmom]

ask away!

no progress in setting up contact...i got a picture from her through the SW two weeks ago today. the SW assures me that she is just bonding with the baby and getting used to this huge change in her life. so i wait.

[browneyes0707]

So last night I had a dream, and it started off the same way it usually does, going to see a-mom and hiding from DD because she doesn't know we talk. But this time I got "stuck" leaving her neighborhood because I couldn't find my way out and I was walking and she was in the garage, and she saw me hiding in the neighbors yard. She came over to investigate and I tried to sneak off.I was afraid her a-mom would find out that she saw me and wonder why I was lingering around and think that I was going behind her back to contact her. I started to run across the yard and she kept calling after me to wait, and suddently she yelled "I KNOW who you are!!!" And I froze, not sure that to do next. And she asked me why I was running from her and sneaking around. And then her a-mom came out of the house because she heard her yelling and wanted to make sure she was OK. And she kept saying "It's OK, I'm OK" to both of us. She said she was glad that I was there and that I didn't have to sneak around anymore.

You think I have might have a guilty conscience? LOL!! All I know is that it freaked me out all day.

[bromanchik]

Originally Posted by browneyes0707

So last night I had a dream, and it started off the same way it usually does, going to see a-mom and hiding from DD because she doesn't know we talk.

I am sure you probably told us before, but why doesn't she know that you guys talk?

That dream is pretty self explainitory.

[lahdh4]

My dreams are starting again. I don't know if it is because E was going to call L.

[browneyes0707]

Originally Posted by bromanchik

I am sure you probably told us before, but why doesn't she know that you guys talk?

That dream is pretty self explainitory.

It's OK Brenda, I forget who knows what sometimes, LOL!!

My ex (her b-dad) contacted DD on her myspace account last summer after we both found her page and it mentioned that she wanted to meet her bio parents. She's only 14, and it freaked her out, so when I contacted her a-mom a month later (not knowing what had happened) she said she was going to wait to tell her I wrote since she had been so shocked to hear from her b-dad. A few months later, she told me that when she had tried to talk to DD to follow up about her b-dad she will only say she is not ready and wont talk about it. So her a-mom felt it was best not to push her because she wants the reunion between us to be positive. That is all I know, it's been about three months and I havent been told otherwise.
I personally would rather her be toldthat I have contacted her and let her decide and whatever it is it is and I'm OK with it, but it's not my decision and I have to have faith that a-mom knows her best. I just don't like the secrecy, since I know all too well the slippery slope that is!!

I think the dream is an expression of that too.