[Lots_of_faith]

This is my first time posting....I gave my daughter up for adoption almost 19 years ago. Through a search i found her address. I spent months writing her parents a 2 page letter out of respect to them and felt the letter was very sensitive to their feelings. However, i received a 3 sentence letter back from them stating to give them their privacy and that this was not the "right time." In addition, they said they would make the next contact.
I was shocked, angry, and hurt at what i viewed in front of me.
I am pretty sure i know where my daughter is going to college at this time, but i am at a loss what to do. She is of legal age.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you so much.
Lucy
milliken93@hotmail.com

[debsdone]

Did they say they had even told her? She is an adult, she should make the decision. What did they say? Debi

[Lots_of_faith]

Thanks for your reply Debi. That is the mystery to all this....does my daughter know that she is even adopted???? I have shared the adoptive parents letter with those closest to me and they all think that my daughter doesn't even know that she is adopted.....Ouch. That hurts. Lucy

[debsdone]

sorry Lucy. Since your daughter is an adult, i would write again and tell them you need something that will convince you that "this isn't the right time" comes from your daughter, not them. Let them know you are writing as a courtesy, you could easily contact her yourself, and you will if need be. Everyone is adult in this situation. If you were respectul and kind, and they were rude and disrespectful, you need to think of what is best for your daughter and yourself. Just let them know that "dismissing" you isn't acceptable. Good Luck Love, Debi

[Lots_of_faith]

Thanks Debi....that was awesome advice and i think i will start there!! Anyone else have any advice that they may like to share?
The more input, the better decisions i will be able to make.
Thank You.

[chancejaeyeong]

Boycrimson
Boy that is hard i know years ago they did not tell people they were adopted exspecialy domestic. I hope it all works out for you?
God Bless
Liz

[chancejaeyeong]

sorry it says crimson that was supposed to be the color :