[KimmySurroMommy]

I am an Army wife and mother to a wonderful 3 year old baby girl. I am also a surogate mother to a baby I had last year. I wanted to have help her parents and have another baby for them. Not thinking, 3 days after insems, I had sex with my husband and though protected the ultra sounds point right to that night and so there is a small chance that this baby could be my husbands.

Surrogacy is hard, but so worth it. Adoption to me seems worlds different.

I am here because after talking for months with both the parents and my husband it looks like I will give this baby to the intended parents regardless of who the father is. My husband is amazsing and wonderful and a great father but he thinks it will be just too hard on us to have another child any time soon. With the war, and money, and seeing we are still young.

I am very worried that if this baby is his, she will grow up and be upset that we kept her sister but not her. I love Emmas parents and they are close to us. They promise that the girls will know how much I love them and why I have done what I have done. In the end this baby was planned to be with them....
Still my heart bleeds at the thought of giving up a child that is partly my husbands. If only you ladies could know how amazing he is.

I am alone with my 3 year old, no family support, and my husband is at war and has been in the part of the world for 2 months now. Chances are I will be giving birth without his support. If this baby comes out looking like him and our daughter, blond hair and blue eyes, I am not sure how I will deal....

Will this baby be mad at me when she grows up?

Blessings,
Kimmy

[vicrose]

Kimmy, From the point of view of an adoptee, NO the baby will not hate you. I was given up for adoption as an infant, and I have never hated my birthmother and birthfather for giving me up for adoption. But, at least today there are open adoptions, and in your case you are friendly with the parents, so it won't be so hard to keep the relationship going once the baby is born. Are you in counseling right now? If not, it may be a good thing to look into, because your husband is at war, you have a 3 year old, and giving this baby to this couple without any support network around you is going to be very stressful and emotional, and you might just need a friend to talk to, and the counselor could be there for you. Sincerely, Brenda........