[Jennasmama]

I just found out that my babies fathers parents are kicking me out because its my fault they are going in debt. They say that they are tired of supporting the baby's father and I. We dont ask for anything. We go to work (both of us are full time), eat meals, take showers, watch tv, and I go to college 3 nights a week. We have spent two hundred dollars each pay check (one hundred each) to buy baby supplies(nursery items, travel items, baby care items). We dont ask for anything when they go on their weekly shopping trips.

Plus, his parents want to have a paturnity test done. They call me a slut becuause I'm having my second baby and I'm only 18 (by the same dady). They never asked for a paturnity test on their first grandchild. Does any one have any ideas why? The way they keep doing this stuff to me, I am making a decision not to let them having anything to do with this baby, if I choose to parent or adopt out.

They dont have anything to do with my first child because they blamed the debt problem on me back when I was 16 (yet they were getting my fathers child support money for me) and kicked me out because I was lying to them saying their son was the fater. Back then, I was smart enough to move in with my mom and quit the contact with the father of my first child.

This time around, he wants to be a part of this babies life no matter what. I tell him he will have to do something about his parents if he wants to be with the baby and I. He wont leave them alone or tell them its his child and tell them how it is (stop blaming us for not knowing how to manage money and that he is the father). His parents expect him to do everything they say and he thinks if he doesnt they will kick him out. I offered to move in to an apartment with him but he says we cant afford it.
Any ideas on what we can do? Anything thing will be in consideration!!

You can contact me at Fallenangel7797@aol.com

[marysblessings]

Hello. I have a biological sister who was in a similar situation. She had three children while living with her boyfriend's parents on and off for six years. He did not work steadily, so finding a place was difficult. What she ended up doing was working a full-time position while waiting for Section 8 housing to come through. It was difficult for her to finally get this help, but she is happy she did it now. For a while, she lived with us, and my husband and I were even able to set her up in her own place, but she was in a co-dependent and abusive relationship with her boyfriend. He convinced her back everytime. It was not until one of her children was permanently maimed before she left him (and her in-laws) for her own place.

Blessings,
Mary

[Jennasmama]

Im off to see an attorney today about this situation to see if they can get any kind of custody (saying I'm not a good mother or something about the frist adoption). If they do get to have anything to do with this baby I want it to be supervised cuz his mom is a B**ch and gets upset about the smallest thing (ie. her day to do the dishes and the dishwasher was ran the night before so she has to empty it).
I'm waiting for my ex-boyfriends father to talk with him to see whats really on his mind becuase hes telling both of us a different story. After that happens, I will know how to proceed in this situation if I choose to parent. I would like to have him sign over his rights but I dont think I have the heart to since he has made the effort to change so much and bee a better parent.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed for this appointment to go well and hope I can remember all my questions and the answers given to me!! LOL!!

Thanks for your support and letting me know that anything can happen for the better (even if it takes a while)!

[marysblessings]

For the purpose of our discussion, I will give the name Sue to my biological sister. Okay, now her mother in-law threatened her with taking her children from her, even though her son was the abusive one. She was so mean to Sue, really nit-picky. If there was a toy left out or supper was not ready, sometimes, she would call Sue names or tell her to leave. Her in-laws always took their son's side, even after permanently injuring their grandchild.

It is too bad that your baby's father's parents are not more respectful of you. That is an important factor in a healthy relationship. I hope you find the help you need.

Blessings,
Mary

[ladyjubilee]

Have you considered increasing your rent payment to help cover their expenses? What about just emptying the dishwasher? Let's be honest, you are living in their home and your list of what-we-do didn't seem to include a great deal of helping around the house.