[unhappilyeverafter]

How do you explain to your previous kids (they are in elementary school) that the new baby isnt going to live with us? How will the adoption effect them?

[Rondidondi]

I had two sons when I was looking at placing my third son for adoption. (Though I did end up parenting him.)
My oldest was 16 at the time-he totally withdrew. Didn't want to talk about it. Or see his brother after birth.
My other son was 8. He questioned everything. I had him speak with my adoption councelor, to help him understand. I think he understood what was going on, but that didn't stop the emotions that come along with the birth of a baby. He was excited as anyone to see the baby. But he bawled like crazy when his brother was handed over to the PAPs. That moments hits me like a ton of bricks. I can still see it.
It is a loss to them as well. Though it's a decision only you and the father can make it does affect the kids that are parented by you.
Explain to them what's going to happen and answer their questons.