[Laura_s_son_11-96]

I chose not to name our son, at the time I thought it would be harder. Plus I didn't know it was an option until the last minute. So, we let them choose the name. I wish now, that we would have named him.

I definitely think you should name your baby or at least collaborate with the aparents.

[Juliana13]

Just a thought to remember - even if you name your child - whether it gets changed or not - Your child may still be listed as "Baby Girl ___" or "Baby Boy ___" on the legal paperwork.

So, if you are an adoptee, and see a generic name like that on the legal paperwork you find, it doesn't mean there was no name given to you by your first parents.

My children's first parents chose names for them, (one we chose together, and she put it on the birth certificate, one chose a first name we couldn't use, but we used her middle name). Anyway, both times a name was given, and an original birth certificate had that name on it, and yet the legal adoption paperwork still said "Baby girl X" and "Baby boy ____(birthmother's last name).

Name are an important part of identity. But if the aparents choose to change the name of your child (and they often do) remember that you still gave your children much of their identity. And no one can ever erase the fact that you were their first parent.

[rottymom]

Yes, I gave her a name and still think of her as that name but I do try to remember that isn't her name anymore. She is still young so I have a few years to get it right before I meet in person (if she wants).

[Laura_s_son_11-96]

I would also like to add that just because the first parent(s) didn't give a name doesn't mean that they didn't care about their baby. Maybe they didn't have the choice or they didn't think that they had a choice in the matter.