[Sparky7]

It's been a few months since i posted but alot has happend in my life and i hope this is the right place to ask this question. If not could you please direct me to the right thread. Ok here goes.

My daugther bdad came back last year after a year of being gone then this year around feb he left again. My daigther will be 3 this year and the years have been really hard so as you could guess a relationship was far from my mind i just wanted some peace and this year i finally got it.
But i am starting to miss being in a relationship and thats when i met this guy. He and i are taking it slow feeling eachother out but having such fun with eachother. He makes me happy i mean i totally gush like a girl and he just a awesome guy. He knows what happend to me and he has had some things in his life go wrong to so we decided to be friends and see what happends. I have a good bet though that it could go somewhere though because yeah like i said we just really connect.

The last person i was with was my little girls b dad and yeah that turned out awesome so yeah i'm scared to death. I'm honestly not tryin to compare them and giving it an open mind but yeah there is still damage with what happend to me. So for those of you who had a relationship after your childs birthfather or birth mother how in the heck do you do that. How do you let go of that fear that something could happen cause yeah he is the first guy after him that makes me want to be in a relationship i didnt think that was possible. So any thoughts advice would be great cause yeah i dont know what to do.

[thanksgivingmom]

Sparky - my daughter will be three this November, and while I've dated guys since her birth (and since her bdad didn't step up to any sort of plate during pregnancy) I haven't had a boyfriend, told any guys about Cupcake (my DD), or felt like I could completely let go of that fear. So I'm afraid I'm not much help! Except that I know what it feels like....that total terror of history repeating itself.

You just have to decide for you, can I trust this man?

I know, it's a LOT to ask, but I think when you know, you'll know. (Corny? Yes, but I believe it).

I think being freinds with this guy first was an awesome and responsible decision on both your parts. Continue to take it slow, see where things develop! Your ability to be honest and open with him in a mature manner bodes well for your ability to have a healthy relationship with him in my opinion. Good luck!!!

[browneyes0707]

Sparky:

It took me a long time to jump in as well. In fact, it was a very long time (10 years) before I really met someone I could trust my heart with 100%, and I married him Not that I didn't date in the meantime, there were a lot of boys I went out with, some I even trusted with the truth about my b-daughter (very few tho!),But looking back, I was very very guarded, and scared of committment, I never let anyone get very close. I even continued to date B-dad on and off for a long time, because it was just easier than having to start over with someone new. At least I knew he was going to break my heart, LOL

The truth is, I wasn't ready. I had supressed a lot of feelings regarding the birth and placement of my daughter, and without healing in a proper environment, I was always going to be scared and unsure.

Take your time, and listen to your heart You'll know if it's right!