[Blessed2x.]

Would you say that Juno's reactions are realistic for her at the time of relinquishment, but that the character lacks the depth and breadth it needs to encompass how this decision impacts her emotionally for the rest of her life?

As an adoptee, I never knew/understood how this affects many bmoms for their entire lives. I just didn't know. It makes me so sad to realize that many, certainly not all, of these moms suffer from something similar to post traumatic stress syndrome.

I know this is not true for everyone..people are individuals and process things differently. This is ok.

[keds]

As a bmom I agree. At the time of my relinquishment, I don't believe that I was aware of the enormity of what I was doing and ultimately the affect that it would have on the rest of my life (and bson's). I could relate to some of Juno's emotions of being "in high school and what the heck I'm not ready for a child) and wanting to ensure the child (I did dislike her referring to it as "thing") had 2 parents and a stable home. I think that her decision to go ahead with the adoption was the right thing to do. She felt that the amom was ready for a baby. I think what we have to remember is that it is a movie, not a documentary so there is some artistic licence.

[Chelstar]

I think that the movie is great. True there is comedy, but they aren't making light of the emotional impact. I think it is good that the subject is coming into the spotlight in such a popular movie. Although I was a little disappointed about the closed adoption. I think open adoptions are better for everyone, and give a pathway to heal all the wounds.

[susieloo]

Yes agathaj..........DAH!!!!!!! Actually spelt backwards its HAD!!!! I think we all were!

[agathaj]

It was just all too easy. The bf has rights but in the movie he didn't seem to have any - he was a minor so I am sure his parents would have had to have been informed and they may have wanted to parent their grandchild. Juno's mother was living in a new family but was never told - yet Juno was a minor so surely she should have been told and perhaps she may have wanted to parent. It was like Juno's father was totally uneffected by the loss of his first grandchild. The stepmother got her dogs? Who cares. I can tell you the ripple effects of the loss of my bchild have been great - losts of sadness. OK I am off to play guitar on the front step without a care in the world......because I have totally forgotten about my bchild....

[browneyes0707]

I can tell you as a teen who relinquished that shortly after I placed I was running off with my friends to go enjoy a sunshiney day like nothing else mattered.

That DID NOT mean I did not care about my DD. I was still in brave strong girl who could handle this all on her own mode. I would not let anyone see the pain I was in. I was in that mode for about 12 years. Since the movie does not extend beyond immediate placement, it's sort of hard to say whether or not this fictional character was unaffected by her placement.

I saw a lot of me and my feelings in Juno. (tho not as blunt and sarcstic) I'm not going to say anyone's opinions on this movie are right or wrong, adoption hits all of us differently, and I personally liked the movie a lot and was able to see it for what it was, but I don't like being told that because I went on with my life as a carefree "normal" teen on the outside that it meant I forgot all about my child. It's impossible to forget.

[Rifilanna]

The message is incomplete. I had an interesting month parenting a teen, (ok this is complicated) who has a pregnant friend, sure the Juno did bring adoption up (more quicky) as an option, but it also brought up "It will all be ok." just as quickly. If we are going to accept this film as an advertisment for adoption, then shouldn't it speak to the emotional/long term impact on the birth famalies? and potential impact on adoptees?

Anyone up for making an indi sequal in which Juno's bchild finds her years later, and resents her for the placement into a nurotic family. Juno, while retaining her sense of humor had never had more children, and is still struggeling with grief? It could be funny, couldn't it?

[thanksgivingmom]

Why are we assuming that we are accepting this film as an advertisement for adoption?

If some people are trying to make it out as an advertisement for adoption then I suggest they look at some of the successes of the movie. Like when Juno's stepmom tells off the ultrasound tech when she is relived to hear that Juno isn't parenting. She was supported by her stepmom and defended. Or how about when the stepmom tells Juno that it's going to be much harder than she thinks. These were real moments that I'm so glad were included. I'm so glad those moments ever got face time, that now there is a script for people dealing with rude ultrasound nurses. That they've seen it done, seen an expectant mother being stood up for and defended. For me, those were powerful moments. Powerful positive moments.

Also, why are we assuming that the sequel has to be complete tragedy?

Yes, undoubtedly there would be some pain in a realistic sequel. There was some pain in the original film. For me, adoption isn't all rainbows and sunshine, but it's not all dark days and tears either. And I don't want to feel guilty about that. I'm no less a birthmom because I allow myself happiness. The fictional character Juno, isn't any less one either because she sang a song with her boyfriend.

[browneyes0707]

Originally Posted by thanksgivingmom

Why are we assuming that we are accepting this film as an advertisement for adoption?

If some people are trying to make it out as an advertisement for adoption then I suggest they look at some of the successes of the movie. Like when Juno's stepmom tells off the ultrasound tech when she is relived to hear that Juno isn't parenting. She was supported by her stepmom and defended. Or how about when the stepmom tells Juno that it's going to be much harder than she thinks. These were real moments that I'm so glad were included. I'm so glad those moments ever got face time, that now there is a script for people dealing with rude ultrasound nurses. That they've seen it done, seen an expectant mother being stood up for and defended. For me, those were powerful moments. Powerful positive moments.

Also, why are we assuming that the sequel has to be complete tragedy?

Yes, undoubtedly there would be some pain in a realistic sequel. There was some pain in the original film. For me, adoption isn't all rainbows and sunshine, but it's not all dark days and tears either. And I don't want to feel guilty about that. I'm no less a birthmom because I allow myself happiness. The fictional character Juno, isn't any less one either because she sang a song with her boyfriend.

Couldn't have said it better myself

I do feel like I'm supposed to hate the movie, I went preparing to hate it after reading everything here about it, and I didn't. I very much enjoyed it. I thought the scene where Juno finds out that the PAP's are splitting and she breaks down on the side of the road was very realistic and a very moving scene, and it showed her vulnerablity. And I think her parents did try to warn her that it wouldn't be so easy, and they did support her and trust her at the same time. I think no matter how old we were at relinquishment, we want to have control of our decision, and not have someone else force their opinions onto us. And the way Juno pokes fun at typical pregnant teen stereotypes, like when she sarcastically asks for a glass of whiskey during her first meeting with the Lorings. I thought that was brilliant, I thought it was brilliant that they created a birthmother character that was strong and witty and not completely dysfunctional or troubled.

Yes, I think the movie portrayed only snapshots and snippets of the experience, but what movie aside from a documentary doesn't do that? And who's to say she will regret her choice in a sequel? There are a lot of birthmothers who don't ever regret their choice, even though they might question it or be deeply affected and changed by it. (I'm one of them) But I think we take out of the movie what our own experiences are, if you struggle and see regret in your own experience, you might project that in this movie, and I understand that. I didn't see it as an advertisement for adoption, I saw it as a character driven plot with adoption being the plot device that drives the development in the characters. I think if we are concerned about the "message" it sends to our youth, maybe we should be sitting down and talking to the teens in our lives about the difference between a situations in a teen movie and reality, and use it as a springboard for discussion, not the absolute message.

[agathaj]

Obviously It would be great if everyone taked to teens about these things...in an ideal world. Perhaps it would have been better when they were sitting on the steps there could have been some sort of symbol ie a necklace that amom had given Juno or she was wearing a locked with a bit of his hair in it = something to show that she still held that baby close to her heart and thought about him. If it had been an OA then the photo of the baby next to her bad would have done the trick. But It did Kinda portray that they had forgotten about him and moved on... BTW I found an old friend on Facebook who had been a big part of my life during relinquishment and felt my pain and the pain many years later - although we have lost contact over the past few years. She raved on about what a great movie it was and would totally recommend it...that hurt me too. I wonder how many of her new friends she is telling my story to and saying how wonderful it all worked out when in fact it hasn't? It is sad how easily things can get twisted.

[bromanchik]

Things get twisted because everyone wants a happy ending.

I have a 15 year old daughter and I talk ad nauseaum to her and her friends. But teen-agers, like the character Juno, think they are invincible, and prefer the hunky dory story to reality.

I, too, would like to see a sequel. I agree that there you can find happiness after placement, but my happines has been hard won and came with a shower of tears. I would just have liked to see some balance.

[zxczxcasdasd]

So as much as I agreed that the movie is a comedy, not an adoption advertisement..there was a huge article in USAToday today, actually a couple that went together...and well, you can read them for yourselves.

Does 'Juno' show strength or glorify teen pregnancy? - USATODAY.com

Movies open door for adoption advocates - USATODAY.com

[Oceans]

Interesting articles.... Advertising for adoption <sigh> but there is a part of me that has to wonder if adoption needs to come more to the forefront of the American conscience...

Along with everyone else teenagers have a lot of misconceptions about adoption. In my family there was direct confrontations of "how could you do that?" and "adoption is low". An interesting thing is that in a school of 300 kids .... so 150ish girls, 4 were openly pregnant - 3 choose to parent - one is 15 and has since dropped out. Teenage pregnancy was/is very acceptable... Which also worries the heck out of me.

There’s a fine line between judgment and acceptance – acceptance and encouragement. It’s scary how young girls are dating young and falling in love so young- it’s cool – and having a boyfriend is soooo important for social status – at least in the microcosm I have seen.

Nationally, 1 in 25 teens gave birth in 2005, in my state it's 1 in 32. It's hard to drive by a High School/College and not think about those numbers...

[SuddenlySusan]

A quote from the link provided above:

"The ads are part of a larger government and private effort to reverse the decrease in the number of single women who place infants for adoption."

Sooooo.... there is a "larger government and private effort" to promote the breaking up of families...

How's that rate for "family values"...? (hurling noises!)

Gah!

Susan

[susieloo]

I am with you there susan. the same sort of hypocracy goes on in my country!
susie