[msng71384]

hi. to make a long story short, I found this website back in midJuly and entered my information in case my son, who I gave up for adoption back in July 1984, was looking for me. I also did a search on this website and think I found him. I sent two messages - again thru his profile here - but haven't heard from him. He put his information on this site back in 2004.

How do I know if the message actually got to him? Do I assume that he's just ignoring me? I think I found his myspace page but don't want to contact him on there in case he did receive my messages thru this website and is choosing now to not be in contact with me.

I am so upset over not knowing if he didn't receive the message or doesn't want to contact me.

Any suggestions??

[txrnr]

Since he added the information 3 years ago, it's definitely possible that his e-mail address is no longer valid. I wouldn't automatically assume he's ignoring you.

[msng71384]

That's what I was thinking too. I know he got out of college this past May and maybe the email was his college email? Do you suggest I contact him via his myspace?? I just don't want it to seem like I'm bugging him if he did receive those two messages.

And I assume that this website doesn't tell you if the email didn't go through?

[sleepdeprived]

I am an adoptee that was recently found through this website, so I thought I would give you an adoptee perspective. When I received my email through this website it did take me a couple of months to muster up a response. Even though I had made a posting, it took some time to digest the whole thing.

I personally don't think there is anything wrong with contacting him through myspace. I would send him one short message saying that you think he may be your birthson based on a posting you saw on this site and maybe give him a fact or two that he can compare. And then give him space to respond. He would not have made a posting if he was not at leasr partially interested in being found, so I think it is more likely that he changed his email address.

Good Luck with your search! I hope you make contact soon!

[msng71384]

Thank you so much sleepdeprived!! I have decided to write to him via his myspace.

I hope I make contact soon too.

And I hope everything went well with your reunion.

[Jannyroo]

Originally Posted by msng71384

Thank you so much sleepdeprived!! I have decided to write to him via his myspace.

I hope I make contact soon too.

And I hope everything went well with your reunion.

Hi, I hope you don't mind me asking, but can someone tell me what "Myspace" is, as I hear about it a lot on this forum, but I don't actually know what it is?? Thanks in advance.

[sleepdeprived]

Good luck and keep us posted! The one other peice of advise I would give is to be open to whatever contact he wants. I see a lot of emails where people have been really disappointed that they find someone and they want something different out of the "relationship". And it seems like some people let it runi the whole reunion. Even if they only want to correspond with an occassional email at first, doesn't mean that they won't want more later. I know I was hesitant, partially due to my loyalty to my parents (who can never be replaced), so it took a little while to be comfortable that my birth family wasn't going to try and move in and take over as my family. And some people just need time and space to process it all.

And thanks for asking about my reunion. It is going well. We are just in the phase of emailing and getting to know each other (it has only been a month). I actually discovered that I have several 100% birth siblings, as my teenage birth parents stayed together after I was born. I think that has been the biggest surprise.

Good luck with your contact!

[sleepdeprived]

It is a website where people set up personal sites and you can add people as your friends and leave messages etc. I personally have never used it.