[thanksgivingmom]

I am a brand new birthmom, just delivering my baby on Thanksgiving. Everything has gone perfectly. I delivered at home by myself and brought her to the hospital. I returned to visit three days later and got to hold and feed my baby and took a polaroid picture with her that I look at everyday. The next day I learned she had been adopted by a wonderful woman who left me a letter, inviting me into her life and the babys. She requested that I be involved and I was terribly excited. I responded with a letter to her detailing my decision and letting her know that I would love to be a part of her life. Just yesterday I learned that my baby was named Ava, which amazingly is what I have always wanted to name a child. Seemingly everything has gone perfectly. I do not regret my decision and feel confident that everything has happened as perfectly as possible.

Now I am waiting for the ball to drop. This cannot be this easy...I am terrified that I will later come out of this cloud of happiness that I am currently in. I hid the pregnancy from everyone and have no one to turn to. I am still living in a very surreal place where I cannot believe I have had a child.

How did other birthmothers cope and feel in the first weeks after birth? Any advice would be welcomed and embraced.

Thanksgivingmom

[SchmennaLeigh]

The ball may or may not drop later. I was fine for a few months before the reality of my decision and its permanance hit me full force. Actually, after the birth of the son I parent with my Husband, I was really thrown for a loop. And that was two years later.

My own healing has been very roller coaster like, with its peaks and valleys. Without some of the ladies here, a few others amazing birth moms and my therapist, I wouldn't be where I am today in regards to "healing." I still have a long way to go... but I'm going!

I encourage you to speak to others about your emotions. Write and journal. And take the relationship with your child's Mom in stride. There will be peaks and valleys there as well.

[SMLH]

How did I cope the first couple weeks? I wrote her (MH) a letter everyday. I cried everyday and then on day 8 I started college, got my mind off things. I had my parents support and that made it alot easier for me. I read a lot of books and just kept to myself for awhile. I had no support group, no therapist, though I should have. I got a cat to take care of.. Missy.. She's still my little baby, though I added a puppy to the 'family' a couple of months ago. (BTW - I am still healing.. my daughter is only 2 1/2)