[julz12-13]

as exciting this all has been w/ the reunion of my bd. its been very emotional. i read the adoption survival guide and i know this is normal. but i think its affecting my judgement. i am trying to let my bd lead this whole thing. but we've been in so much contact for the last week. and yesterday she had her 1st sad encounter...her grandpa was scared he was going to lose her b/c of us getting to know each other. i feel her pulling back. i know we need to rest and recoupe from all the excitement. but i am scared too that she is feeling overwhelmed. she has told me that she is amazed how well we've connected and how i have allowed her to handle everything. but i try so hard to be careful of how i word things. i'll ask her, do you mind i say this or that. nothing pertaining to her parents. just talking about how everything happened w/ her adoption,birth,my kids. and she is VERY cool about my children. b/c she is an only child. in fact, sometimes i think she's more excited about my 17yo dd, than me. they text msg each other alot. i am SO happy that both of them are excepting of each other. they are already saing they are sisters. but i am the thorn i think for her. she doesnt want me to feel left out when it comes to "naming" me. she has brought up thats its weird to say "birthmom" but i'm NOT her mom...she has one that she loves. and sometimes she feels uncomfortable calling me by my 1st name. i have told her i dont even care about any of that. all i want is to know her and hopefully be a part of her life. but then when this all happened w/ her grandpa, and she's very close w/ her gparents...its made her stop and think. she said she knew it was gernational...which i assumed too. then i didnt hear from her again. i know i have been fortunate for all the communication she has given me. its more than most have. especially in the begining. just PLEASE help me!!! what do i do how do i handle my self?!!!

[mrsred]

Each time, before you speak with her just pray for guidance. This is rocky terrain for both of you but you can forge ahead. Think of the mountain goat, climbing to the summit. He does not plan each step carefully, he keeps his mind on where he is going. Yet he never makes a mistep. Pray before hand, and then with faith, you can move forward, trusting that God will guide you.

[julz12-13]

Originally Posted by mrsred

Each time, before you speak with her just pray for guidance. This is rocky terrain for both of you but you can forge ahead. Think of the mountain goat, climbing to the summit. He does not plan each step carefully, he keeps his mind on where he is going. Yet he never makes a mistep. Pray before hand, and then with faith, you can move forward, trusting that God will guide you.

you have helped me tremendously!!!! you are SO right! i've been praying, but not before. its SO wonderful how God uses ppl to give us reminders. thank you thank you!!