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Originally Posted By Sherry

I am looking for a girl born in Kansas at Bethany hosiptal in may of 1975. I don't and won't interfer in your life. I just want to know that you have been happy and loved. I never stopped loving you even though I gave you up. If you are interested in meeting or talking to me. Please email me.

[Archive]

Originally Posted By Carol, Birthfamily Support Forum

Dear Sherry:
Your daughter will be 24 in May and, since this generation is computer-savvy, there is a good chance that she has already discovered the Reunion Movement and may have already joined a Reunion Registry in hope of meeting you.

Don't you have the exact date of Birth? Where in Kansas is Bethany Hospital? What other information do you have?

If you go to our HOME page, you'll find a button that will take you to the SEARCH REGISTRY. The Registry provides a form for you to fill in with pertinent information for a "match."
You can also run a Search there, to see if your daughter is already registered at our site.

Next, log on to http://www.reunionregistry.org/regist.htm, where you will find a list of on-line Registries. Log on to each of these and post your information.

Keep in mind, that you must return to check these Registries periodically, or, you can steer the person who responds to MY Support Page here at http://www.adopting.org (Birth family Support), and have them post an answer or inquiry with me.

Next, and probably one of the most important Registries, is the International Soundex Reunion Registry (ISRR). This is the oldest and best known Registry in the world; thousands of Birthfamilies and Adoptees owe their reunions to having posted on this registry. Send a self-addressed, stamped #10 envelope to ISRR, P.O. Box 2312, Carson City, NEV 89702-2312, and they will send you a Registry Form to complete and return to them for listing. If they find a match, you will both be contacted.

Next: At our HOME page Directory you will also find a READING ROOM containing many very helpful articles geared toward helping you prepare yourself for Reunion, and to understand ALL sides of the Adoption Triad. This is very important. For years you've lived for Reunion and all your thoughts have been on your "baby." Now, that "baby" is a grown young lady (possibly married, possibly a mother herself). She already HAS a Mom and Dad who have loved and nurtured her for 24 years. It is very important that you understand that. Your daughter will not come running and drop everything because she found her birth Mother. She will have to adapt, and you will have to learn how to give her the space she needs, and let HER be in control. It isn't easy, you have to work at it. We are mothers in fact and genes and maybe looks and talents; but our daughter knows a mother "in flesh" -- arms that held her and fed her, a voice that calmed her and taught her. We have to find ANOTHER place in her life, and it will take TIME.

Our BOOK SHOP offers reviews on many excellent books that tell the "stories" of all members of the Triad. They will help you better understand your daughter's and her mom and dad's feelings and fears, as well as help you to understand your OWN feelings and fears and work to overcome them.

It is very important too, the understand that you are NOT alone and you NEVER have been alone. There are thousands of us birthparents out in the world who have experienced the same pain and lonliness as you and most of us are willing to share our experiences and our compassion and understanding with you.

If you read my story of Reunion (and others on this site) you will recognize yourself and your concerns, and you'll have a guidelines of sorts to use as your Reunion unfolds and you begin your journey on the path of Recovery.

Hang in there Sherry. The best is yet to come, and all the hassles and problems and potholes in the path are well worth battling.
Please keep in contact with me. If you want private contact, feel free to e-mail me at mcbird@bellsouth.net or z004259b@bc.seflin.org.

Hugs and good luck, CAROL