[raybuffer]

Sherri,

First, before going to the court house, you will want to contact the agency or department that handled the adoption. They should confirm with you whether the adoption was finalized in Laurens County. Even though she was born there she could have been brought to another county (or sometimes a state) for the finalized adoption. They should tell you that much.

Her original birth certificate will be sealed so if you only know her name given at birth, it will not help. Only her new name (which you more than likely do not know) will be 'possibly' a matter of public record. That is why you need to locate a birth index and cross reference it with all "finalized adoption decrees" found at the correct courthouse for a period of two years following her birth.

Good Luck and Best Wishes!

Ray

[Sherri Etters]

Ray,
My mother told me that the laurens county DSS told them that she would be adopted in the lower part of the state. How will I find out if her adoption was finalized in laurens county or not. The DSS will not tell me anything further than the information I have paid for. The 7 pages of nonindentifying information just list some things about her aparents and afrandparents. I also received 4 pictures that were taken sometime before she was placed in her permanent home. Is there any other way of finding out what county her adoption was finalized through.
Thanks for all your helpful imput, sherri

[raybuffer]

My only suggestion is for you to ask DSS yourself; to specify the county in which the adoption was finalized. Many times they will confirm this, you may simply need to ask specifically.
If Laurens County DSS said that your child would be adopted in the lower part of the state, and Laurens County is not in the lower part of the state, then you are looking at another county for finalization. You should go through those 7 pages with a fine tooth comb and make a list of questions that seem reasonably "nonidentifying" to call and ask DSS. They may furnish you with more answers which can help you piece together some parts of the puzzle.

Ray

[kjm69]

Ray & Patrisha,

It has been awhile since I wrote in, but wanted to tell you that I had some luck with my daughter's original birth certificate. As you know she was born in Washington DC and adopted through Catholic Charities. We are in re-union almost 2 years now and she seached for me and paid the $400.

I last posted that I was going to try and get it by writing to DC Vital records and requesting her BC as her mother. I did but they sent me my BC.

I then wrote a letter to Catholic Charities in DC and requested a copy of her original BC, the relinquishment papers I had signed, and the opportunity to view the records Catholic Charities had kept on me at the time. I had a very unpleasant conversation with a Ms. Diane Banks, program director of CC, Wash., DC. She was very unsympathetic and told me in no uncertain terms that I could not see or even have read to me anything from the records. I did however get in the mail a copy of her original BC. The social worker who worked on the case said the reliquishment papers were unavailable--"re-sealed".

I also asked them what paperwork my daughter should have for the $400 she sent them (CC) and I was told nothing!! That to me is crazy as she should have an "Adoption Case Number" to have opened the records. Also she should have been told the judges name something! She has no paperwork what so ever.

I am in the process of writng to the head of Catholic Charities in Washington as well as the Archbishop to appeal to them to let me see my records. By the way these records are not the sealed ones that contain the adoption, but rather the notes from the social workers that worked on my case. My daughter was read notes from these records--things I said, but I was refused the same courtesy.

Bottom Line is I am fed up with this beauracy and the "system". Everyone is well aware of each other in our situation, and there are no secrets any more--why then should I not be given the right to see and view what was written about me??

I guess my question to Ray is when do we march on Washington DC to get these laws changed? I am willing to do anything to stop this insanity.

Is there anyone organizing this effort besides you Ray?

Let me know,
Janet

[raybuffer]

Janet,

To my knowledge, no one is entertaining the idea on a national/federal level except the Adoptees' Caucus for Truth (ACT). Bastard Nation, the GRC and other local grassroot organizations support state by state action, which ACT monitors and engages in as well.

Our goal is reflected in our motto: "One Right, One Focus". We are firmly behind the unconditional right (meaning no contact vetos or mutual registries) of all adult adoptees to their original birth certificate. If this were supported federally, we believe each state could then be convinced to simply open records completely. The petition is up over 5500 signatures and continues to grow while we in ACT grow in our understanding of the current state of adoption reform by battling safe haven laws and mutations in adoption law. It is our expectation that after the petition has had a year to circulate (November 2003) that we will have made the contacts necessary in Congress to introduce our petition and have our demands heard.

You can assist us in our planning and evolving by joining the mailing list below on Yahoo by clicking the link.

Ray Buffer
http://www.raybuffer.com

Visit http://adopteerights.cjb.net
and tour all of Ray's Adoptee Activism Sites.

Ray was born September 2, 1969 in West Palm Beach, FL, http://adoptee.cjb.net and is the Moderator of Adoptee Activists on Yahoo at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/adopteeactivists

FIGHT FOR ADOPTEE RIGHTS!

[amy claire]

My name is Brian Linton and I gave my daughter up for adoption when I was 17.That was in 1974, in Sacramento C.A. She was born on oct. 5th 1974. I got some letters from the social services for awhile but they were really confusing. I have been searching for her since she has been 18. please help me if you can. my e-mail is aclinton9@hotmail.com

[raybuffer]

Brian,

Have you tried going to the county of your child's adoption and comparing all the adoption dates in the county recorder's office for a two year period following your child's birth, with your child's birth date. It's a long process of ellimination but should yield results with patience. First you make a list of all the children's names who were adopted, elliminate those that are not the same sex as your child, then look up birth dates for these children until you come up with some that match (or are very close to) your child's. I believe California vital records are still available online, but may not be complete.


Access to California Adoption Records or Information Non-identifying information, as well as letters, photographs or other items of personal property in the possession of the agency are to be released to the person for whom they were intended after the adoptee turns eighteen, provided that there is a written consent to the release of the person items.

In the case of adoptions occurring before 1984, contact between an adoptee and birth parent may be arranged if the adoptee, birth parents and adoptive parents have filed waivers of confidentiality with the Department or agency. The Department or agency is prohibited from soliciting such waiver.

In the case of adoptions occurring after 1984, adoptees may receive identifying information about their birth parents (including the most current known address) at the age of 21 if the Department of Social Services or a licensed adoption agency has received an affidavit from the birth parent authorizing such disclosure.

Identifying information is available to adoptive parents any time the Department or agency determines that "medical necessity or other extraordinary circumstances justify the disclosure."

In the case of adoptions occurring after January 1, 1984, birth parents may receive information regarding the status of their child any time after the adoption, except identifying information respecting the adoptive family.

Identifying information regarding the adoptee may be disclosed if the adoptee is over 21 and has filed a consent to such disclosure.

Biological siblings may be "matched" with an adoptee who is over 21 if waivers of confidentiality are filed. The birth parent must consent to release of identifying information if the sibling lived with the birth parent until he or she reached 18.

Birth parents can access "non-identifying" information regarding the adoptive family. Adult adoptees and birth parents can use the passive registry. This type of registry requires both parties to independently post their information to trigger a match. When a match occurs, both parties are notified. There is a consent waiver that can be signed by the adoptee, the birth parent or siblings which would be placed in the file and allow contact information to be forwarded once a matching consent was sent.
The courts can release identifying information to the adoptee with a "compelling need" for medical information.

Obtaining Non-Identifying Information: Adopted adults age 18 or older and adoptive parents of adoptees younger than 18 may request non-identifying information from the adoption agency or from the government department that joined in the adoption petition. If the request is denied, the party seeking information may petition the court in which the adoption was finalized. Birth parents can receive information on the status of the adoption and the adoptive parents at time of placement.

Obtaining Identifying Information: If the adoption was finalized on or after January 1, 1984, the adopted adult age 18 or older can receive information on the birth parents if the birth parents have given written consent to the disclosure. Birth parents can receive information on an adopted adult age 21 or older if the adopted adult has given written consent to disclosure.

Disclosures are filed with the adoption agency or the government agency that joined in the adoption petition. Adoptive parents of a person younger than 21 can receive information on the birth parents if there is a medical necessity or other extraordinary circumstances that justify the disclosure according to the State Department of Social Services or licensed adoption agency. If the adoption was finalized before January 1, 1984, with consent of both requesting parties, the agency shall arrange contact between the birth parents and adopted adult. The agency shall release the names and addresses of birth siblings age 21 or older to one another if the birth siblings have filed consent.

Using the Adoption Registry: Adopted adults age 18 or older and birth parents of an adopted adult may register. Siblings age 21 or older may register to meet a sibling 21 or older who was adopted.

For further registry information, contact:

California Department of Social Services
Adoption Branch
744 P Street, MS 19-31
Sacramento, CA 95814
(916) 322-3778

Some California Searchers:

JuliRallen@aol.com (Julie Allen)
and
http://www.lanz.com/reconnect/form.htm (Patty Lawrence)


Best Regards and Good Luck,

Ray Buffer

[Sherri Etters]

You wrote of california. Is this true of South Carolina also? Do the government agencies work the same way here. My daughter will be 26 years olon July 17, 1977. I have been looking for her since she turned 18 years old in 1995. If you have any helpful information, could you please let me know.
Thank you,
sherri

[raybuffer]

Each state is different , however what I wrote about as far as searching the courthouse where the adoption transpired for all adoption decrees and cross referencing them with births is the traditional means for birthmothers to do their own searches. Some states make it easier by having what are called "Birth Indexes"

A South Carolina statistics and Geneology Site:
http://www.familyhistory.com/state.asp?state=SC

Search and Support for South Carolina Folk
http://members.aol.com/deitrahs/SoCarolina.html

Adoption Search for Life
303 Brighton Road
Anderson, SC 29621

Adoptees & Birthparents in Search
P.O. Box 5551
Cayce-West Columbia, SC 29171

A.A.L.M. Triad
1725 Atascadero Drive
Columbia, SC 29206

Adoptees & Birthparents in Search
Betty Tharin
P.O. Box 4883
Florence, SC 29502

Bits & Pieces
P.O. Box 380
Norris, SC 29667

HomeBase
Box 7966
N. Augusta SC 29841

Adoptees & Birth Parents in Search
Pollie Robinson
A.L.A.R.M. Network Rep.
263 Lemonade Road
Pacolet, SC 29372

Adoption & Family Reunion Center
Box 103
Pacolet SC 29373

Adoptees & Birthparents in Search
Karen Conner
P.O. Box 5551
West Columbia, SC 29171


Emails to Search Angels near you:
SUMTER:
bjsumter@cpis.net
SPARTANBURG
garn84@aol.com
GREENVILLE/ANDERSON
Deadow@aol.com

Office of Vital Records
2600 Bull Street
Columbia, SC 29201
(803) 734-4830


Overview of South Carolina Adoption Information In South Carolina, there is a mutual consent registry for adult adoptees (age 21), birth parent(s), and biological siblings of adoptees. Counseling must be provided by an adoption agency prior to the release of identifying information.
For registry information, contact:

Adoption Reunion Register
Department of Social Services
P. O. Box 1520
Columbia, South Carolina 29202-1520
Telephone: (803 734-6095
S.C. Code Ann. 20-7-1780

Good Luck,

Ray

[Sherri Etters]

Hi Ray,
I appreciate so much the reply to my thread. I have e-mailed the three search angles you sent me. I sure hope this turns out for the best. I would love more than anything to find my daughter. I have waited so long, and I have always loved her so much. I would love to be able to tell her how I feel about her. It would even be good to be able to tell the whole story of what happened, and I wanted so much to keep her.
Thank you, sherri

[kridgeway]

Ray

I know this thread is for parents, but I was hoping you could give me some advise on where to turn to once you have exhausted all of your resources. The un-iditifing info. I have and just aren't getting anywhere. I know the hospital, Dr., mother's first name (Ann) and father's starts with (J) which is a 3-4 letter name. There ages. Please give me some type of guidence.

Baby Boy Mark (Chris)

[deboyd2b]

Originally Posted by raybuffer

I will post this thread in each of the triad's forums (total of 3). I am wondering if there are any Birth Parents who have adoptees with sealed records, that are curious to know the information that is sealed and what reasons you would have for being curious and what rights you believe you have to the information. Birth Parents only, please.

Ray Buffer

First of all i am a birth mom who in 1981 i gave my beautiful daughter to total strangers who were so egar to be parents. i trusted them to make all the right dissions and to be good to her and treat her like the angel she was. so if i was good enough to trust them with the life of my angel then why don't i have the right to know how she is and if my decision was a good one. i trusted them they should at lease incurage her and support her in knowing me

[Patty-cake]

My daughter allowed me to read the sealed records that she obtained. Since most of it was about me I certainly think that I have a right to it. It is my history medical and otherwise. Besides she was legaly my child until the papers were signed.

I was amazed to learn that the family medical history isn't given to the adoptive parents imediatly. It seems that would be in the best interest of the child.

It was sad to read the councilor's notes because I remember being that girl that just wanted to keep her baby but at least she wrote the truth.

I was curious what was written about the birth because I ripped. I'm not satisfied with the explaination but what did I expect?

I was pleased to see that my requests concerning a.parents were honored. You see before I had no way of knowing. In the section about the a.parents were not just a social study but many letters from a.mom writting to report on the other children that they had adopted and saying how much she would like to adopt one more. If I hadn't asked for an older couple (back then late 30's was considered old for having a baby) that already had children they may not have gotten one more. My daughter says they had given up- then they got a phone call. Anyway those letters are probably as close as I'll ever come to knowing a.mom and they made me feel better.

[mello41]

I am a birth mom and yes i think i and other birth parents have the right to know what happened to theire child because everyone makes mistakes.some might be because of a mental illness or other things.in my case i have a daughter who is 26 years old and after i had my daughter i changed.i do not even remember holding her. i went to psychiartrist when i was 26.i got married at 24 and have 2 boys.i am not the kind of mother with my two boys that i was with my daughter brandy. the doctors say it was post pardon depression and mental illness runs in my family. i suffer everyday for leaving her. it's true i was homeless and i did not have a home for my daughter and i. i try to forgive myself myself for leaving her to her father,but i think i never will.until i had my 21 year old 5 years later i could not stand to be around children. after my son was born i realized that children depended on theire parents to love, protect, and be theire for them. i was none of those things. i feel like that god will definetly punish me for my actions with brandy. i should have begged for help, but i really did not realize until years later that i was mentally sick. god bless you. mello41us@yahoo.com

[keds]

My bson brought his records with him at our first F2F and it was amazing to read the counsellor's notes, all the info about our family and the letter that I wrote to him so long ago. A real eye opener and, I think, had a lot to do with him searching me out.