[-emma-lee-]

My baby girl is almost 4 weeks old now. She went home with her adoptive family last week. They are amazing and have called me 2 times to tell me that my daughter is doing okay, and have sent me pictures already. (its an open adoption) I am so thankful that they keep good contact.
Anyways, its so good for her and I'm so happy.. but I can't help missing my daughter. I just miss her so much and I dont know what to do without her, or where to go with life with her gone. I just don't know what to do with myself. I want to start my fresh life and get back to things but the only thing I find myself wanting to do is be wtih my baby girl and the only thing i can picture myself doing is raising her. I know I made the right choice for her life, but I can't help but wanting to raise her myself. I really want to raise her, and keep her as my own. But I know she will have a much better life with her new family. Its so hard with her gone. Theres not a moment I'm not thinking about her, and loving her.

[bromanchik]

Oh sweetie, it's only been 4 weeks. That is not a long time when you've lost a baby. Open adoption does not alleviate the losses. Your baby is gone and she will be a different person as she grows because you have not raised her. That is what is lost and it is a huge loss.

Are you second guessing your decision?

[-emma-lee-]

not second guessing, i just really really wanted to keep her as my own. I just knew I couldn't. It would be so easy to blame everyone (my parents for telling me I cant live at home with her, everyone telling me to give her away) but in the end, I signed the pappers, and I knew that my daughter would have a better life with 2 parents who could afford to raise her.
it just sucks, i wish i could of done it myself;.

[bromanchik]

Originally Posted by -emma-lee-

not second guessing, i just really really wanted to keep her as my own. I just knew I couldn't.

It is a hard thing to know that you cannot raise your own child the way you want them to be raised. I have been there. You are in my thoughts.....

[Jackiejdajda]

emma-lee

I signed the pappers, and I knew that my daughter would have a better life with 2 parents who could afford to raise her.
it just sucks, i wish i could of done it myself;.

I could not afford to raise my son.. and when I found him all grown up I found that he has had a good life..
I am so sorry for your loss..

Stay with us..

Jackie