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I am a 16 year old who has become pregant by a 21 year old married man. We only slept to gather twice. I am going to give the baby up for adoption to this wonderful family because I can not take care of it. Do I have to let him know what I am doing? Does he have to give up his rights as a parent also for this to be a legal adoption? Please hurry and let me know because this is detroying me .

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Originally Posted By Brenda Romanchik

Yes, the birthfather does need to sign away his parental rights in most states. You need to talk to an adoption attorney in your area. If this is a private adoption, you need to have your own lawyer, seperate from the lawyer the adoptive family is using. If you are going through an agency, most agencies have a lawyer on staff who can answer these types of questions.

There may also be further complications depending on what the state law is for statutory rape. (Having sex with a minor&gt Please also let the lawyer know what your ages were at the time of conception. If you have a hard time finding a lawyer in your area contact me privately at brenr@r2press.com

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I relinquished my son many years ago. For personal reasons I did not want to inform the father. Legally I was supposed to tell him and the lawyers, social workers etc. This may sound terrible, but I just told them there had been so many men (not true, there was only one) I had no idea who it was.Once I assured them the father could not possibly be a Native American (some other law) they let it drop. This may not be sound legal advice but it worked for me.

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Originally Posted By hillary

DEFINATELY tell the father. My fiancee was recently told about a baby he had no idea existed. He was asked to make a decision on wheather or not to give it up for adoption. The birth mother had already signed over her rights, so the baby was entirely his. It upset him, because it is his child too. We've opted for an open adoption, that he wants very much to be a part of. The father has a right to know, not only for legal reasons. It hurt him greatly to give the child up to the adoptive parents, after we thought of everything possible to allow us to keep the baby. (We are young and in college- not prepared for a family.) Fathers have feelings about adoption, too.

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I placed my daughter 15 mths ago for adoption and did not tell the father. He was married, but was seperated from his wife. He wanted to have a life with me, but he had too many problems for me. I knew right away I was pregnant and told him before I even took the test. I also knew I was having a girl. He said "Real men don't have girls, so if it is a girl it isn't mine." Ok fine. I didn't want to be with him and knew I couldn't take care of the baby so I placed her for adoption. I told the attorney and social workers adn even the adoptive family that I had been "partying" alot, and didn't know who the father was. Even thought I did know for sure. I am out of state from where I am from and if I ever run into him I am syaing I had a miscarriage. I know what i did was "wrong", but I feel it was the best for my daughter. So I feel do what you feel is best.

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I am a 19 yr. old single mother of a 2yr. old son. His father and I do not get along - we are like vinegar and oil! I got pregnant again by him and he decides not to care. I didn't want to tell him about the baby but I thought he should know - he was the father! When I did tell him it was like I never did! He did not care! He was quick to sign the papers and was not there for the birth. I only regret telling him. My daughter is with the BEST parents in the world. She lives off of their love! I have moved on with my life and only regret ever meeting him! My son and I are happy together! It's only up to you to tell hime. It is YOUR baby!