[heartened]

I've often wondered if anyone else feels this way - do you like your name? Does it "fit" you? Have you ever considered changing it? If you are an adoptee, do you know your birth name? And if so, does that seem to fit you better?

I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts about names!

[Southernroots]

Didn't name my son - did not know that I had that right. I so wish that I had. However, the name that his adoptive parents chose was very similar to a name that I had considered naming him - Christian was a name that I was thinking of - Christopher is what his aparents named him.

Does your name "fit" for you? I will be interested to see other responses - it's an interesting question.

[shiloblwe]

I love my name. I am an adoptee as is my younger brother AND my husband. We all agree. My parents named both of us as soon as they saw us at the hospital(s). I can't imagine having any other name.

[Jensboys]

The sister I was reunited with (my mom is her birth mom) was named B by my mom, renamed L by her aparents and when she reunited with my mom, changed her name to Ashley (???). To me, she certainly didnt seem a "B", nor an Ashley (she was mid 20s at this point and all Ashley's I knew then were 6 year old girls) but really suited Lynn.

I think that if she had liked her birth name more, she would of changed her name, but she really said she did not feel like the name her aparents gave her.

[MrsSmith]

My bmom was told she HAD to name me something for my birth cert, so she named me, knowing that my parents would be naming me when they took me home from the hospital anyhow. My parents don't know what my name was at birth, and my bmom refuses to tell me what she named me. All she'll say is "Your name is Heather. That's what your parents named you and it is a lovely name."

Now, growing up in the 70s/80s as I did, there were many, many other Heathers around. I was one of at least 3 Heathers in my class in school any given year. That stunk - I longed to be "original" and unique. As a child, I harbored fantasies of changing my name to something more unusual. (I went through a phase where I wanted to change my name to "Cassandra Roxanne" which I thought sounded sophisticated and classy, LOL, and I went through an "Evangeline" period too. Yes, I was quite a weird kid!) However, any thoughts or desires to change my name did NOT have anything to do with being adopted; it was just because I wanted a less common name.

As an adult, I have no issues with my name anymore - it is also a lot less common these days, or so it seems.

I'm still curious as to what name my bmom gave me, but since she isn't telling, I guess I'll never know. Not a big deal anyway, just curiousity.

[mlassi]

Well, both my asibs were named after a afamily member and I wondered who I was named after. My amom finally told me that my bmom was going to name me Mary. I didnt believe her (long story there lol), but when I found my bmom, she said she had planned to name me Mary but with a different middle name.
Mary

[Raina0831]

I've often wondered if anyone else feels this way - do you like your name?

I have always hated, hated, hated the name my aparents gave me. I've always said that when I'm 80, I might start to like it. It is definitely an "old" name. I go by a nickname (shortened version of the official name) and to this day, when people find out what my name is, they laugh. Because my name is/was so different from everyone else's, it was just another thing that made me feel like I didn't fit anywhere.

Does it "fit" you?

I guess I've never really thought about whether my name fits me because I've always disliked it so much. I would like to think "no".

Have you ever considered changing it?

No. My aparents would be really hurt if I did that. There's really no reason for it. Now that I am older, I generally tend to think that I'm not the one that chose the name, therefore, it's not my fault that I HAVE a stupid name . I've lived with it this long......

If you are an adoptee, do you know your birth name?

I wasn't named at birth. However, the middle name that my aparents gave me is the same as my bmom's middle name, adn the middle name of one of her other daughters. My aparents didn't know this when they named me and I think if my amom could change my middle name now, she would.

[ahfdragonfly]

I was named after my fathers aunt & his mother, (who I never knew) & while I love her, I HATE MY NAME!!!! (First & middle) I don't know that any other name would "fit" me better, & out of respect I would never change my name, but.... Maybe when I'm 90 my name will fit, but then everyone else in the nursing home will be named "Jennifer", so that will be the new "old lady name"

Millie (Mildred E____)

[lahdh4]

I like my name, it spelled different (not in here I have "seen" 3 others with my first name ) plus people have a tendency to pronounce it wrong.

We didn't name J, she left the hospital as baby girl ____, neither the bdad or myself thought about it. Did talk with the aparents and we all decided on J's name with my name as her middle name. When the bdad and I talked about it we were going in a completely different direction then they were.

[abcg1977]

Yes and No...I always knew both names but, I thought b-mom gave me my b-name. I was wrong it was a nurse so I no longer feel a "link" like I did before to the original name but, it is still a part of me. As is my a-name. I am just me you could call be Hannah or Jane or kelly or Bambi for goddness sakes and I would not care. I like my name but, knowing it was changed bother's me a lot. I can deal with that but, DO NOT mess with me about my b-date that is mine for sure and I was freaked when I thought it may have been changed. Thank God it was not. THAT IS MY DAY!!!

Ang-

[Southernroots]

A very kindly adoptive mom buddy of mine asked the social worker if there was a name that the birth mom of her daughter had used or called her. She wanted to incorporate it and include it as part of her name. The SW told her no, there was no name. She found out later that the birth mom had a name for her and the SW knew the name. Nice, eh? Just one of the many reasons that I am not crazy about many adoption SWs. I do know some aren't like that though

[itsmenancy]

Honestly, I've always wondered what my b.mom and a.mom were thinking when they named me. ...I don't care for either... but what's ya going to do.

I always thought my birth name (middle name) was Alyce, but when I found b.mom last year and found my adoption decree, my birth middle name was Alynn. My middle name is Lynne. Come to find out, b.mom was told to give me a name she would recognise and my parents kept a form of it. But they changed my first name from Tina to Nancy.

B.mom in the beginning said I was Tina to her. She never called me that, but was very vocal in telling me that's how she thought of me - being her Tina Alynn, not Nancy Lynne.

I can't say she has gotten past that - as she seldom calls me by my name. It's usually honey.

I'm ok with all of it because Nancy is all I've ever known, but it is nice to know my b.mom had the chance to name me and thought of something special to just her.

[snuffie]

My bmom named me Maryeen. Anyone ever heard of that name?? At first I thought it was a typo but it is hand written in several places!

[rapunzel_001]

I wouldn't think that there is a necessary corallation between being adopted and liking or not liking your name. Anybody might feel that way, adopted or not.


As for me, it was very weird to find out that there had been someone out there thinking of me by a different name. In fact, my reaction was, wow- that doesn't suit me at all. I like my name, and beyond that, I'm pretty used to it. So I can't imagine having a different one.

[kperoc]

I was adopted at the age of 9, I am fully aware of my birth name. Since my Aparents had 2 bio daughters and one had the same first name that I did, I got to choose a new first, middle and get their last name upon adoption. How cool is that? Very! Still, it is disconcerting that my Birthfamily still thinks of me with my birth name, and in the beginning of reunion wanted to continue to call me by it. I said no, my name is **** now, and that's how I want to be addressed.

Kind of chilling to see my birth name in Gram's bibles and in her picture albums. Like I've had 2 lives one as me, one as her.