[mckenna]

when i became a parent, i swore (which i am finding out you should never do when it comes to parenting) that i would never get into the habit of letting my children sleep with me. i got my son when he was 3 months old. he slept in his crib from the first night. he was very comfortable in his crib even up til his 2nd b-day. we unexpectantly became the foster family for his baby sister. so without any transition time my son was forced out of his crib into a toddler bed the day after he turned two. at the time we were living a very small house and the kids shared a room. tommy kept getting up and crying and waking up the baby. out of convenienc on my part i would let him sleep with me (mistake number one). when we moved, the kids had their own room but my son still got up and came in my bed. then he started refusing to sleep in his bed altogehther. i put a crib mattress on my floor and he slept there for awhile but still woke up several times. he sleeps more soundly and gets a better night sleep in my bed. i don't know how or if i should break the habit right now. he is 30months old. my question is how old is too old to co-sleep? (sorry so long)

[FostermomCathie]

We had a family bed with our three children. I still think its not who is sleeping where but who is sleeping. Our kids eventually all got themselves into their own beds it seems like around 3, my daughter was a little older. We usually had matteresses on the floor next to us. Fast forward a very quick 18 years and my advice is not to sweat it, time goes to quickly to be worried about doing things to "right" way. If its a problem then change it otherwise enjoy the time when those little ones actually really want to be with you.

[jewishadoptionblog]

We don't do "co-sleeping" every night, but we are really fine with having our daughter sleep with us when she feels she wants to. She always starts the night in her bed (well except for this weekend - you can read about that on my blog) but often ends up in our bed before the night is over. She is 3yrs, 3 months. I remember crawling into my parents bed in the wee hours of the morning - maybe it was a bad dream or whatever. It wasn't specifically co-sleeping, but it was the reassurance that I could go to them if I felt that was where I should be.
What you might want to try is to lie down next to him in his bed until he falls asleep. That way, its a bit of both worlds.

[hopefulamom]

I like you did, SWEAR that I will not let my kids sleep in my bed, however if I have learned one thing it's to not promise myself anything when it comes to parenting.
With that being said, my very best friend is a huge believer in co-sleeping, so I am very familiar with it. I don't really understand it, but then again I'm not a parent yet.
What I can tell you is that you have to do what works for your family. I don't think that you should worry about it if it doesn't bother you. She co-slept with all of her children and they stopped at different ages. She still co-sleeps with her 2 1/2 year old. Both of her older children (6 and 10) have grown up to be healthy, active children with no sleeping problems.

Again, do what feels right to you and what you can handle. My sister started having her baby sleep with her b/c it was the only way she would sleep through the night, but she couldn't handle it. She wasn't getting any sleep and she didn't like it, so she broke her of the habit and she's now back in her crib. It was hard to break her of it, but she did it!! It just takes a lot of patience and a few sleepless nights!!!

Good luck with whatever you decide to do!

[jaydensmommy]

How old is too old? I don't know. My sister's older son slept in his mom's room until he was 9 or 10 (started out in his own bed, but always ended up in hers) Once she tried locking her bedroom door, and he just cried at the door. She swore (again, we should never do this as many of us have found out) that she would never co-sleep with her second child. Well, you guessed it, when he was 8 months old he got really sick with a viral infection and it was easier to have him in her bed with her and her husband. This child is now six and still refuses to sleep by himself. He will either sleep with his parents or his older brother, sometimes starting out in his own room but never at night.

We have an almost 2-year-old son who slept in his crib until he was about a year and a half, and has since been in our bed. We have tried to transition him to a toddler bed, but he will always walk in our room and get up in our bed. So, for now, he's in our bed. We'll take out cues from him as it really doesn't bother us, although I get slightly better sleep when he's in his own bed.

[intladoptionblog]

With my two, Sam at three and a half has no interest whatsoever in sleeping in his own bed. He says he'll sleep with us until he's twenty!
Cj, on the other hand, loves her crib and always has. She's 13 months old now and asks for bed, heaves a heavy, contented sigh when put down, then talks to herself quietly for a few minutes before dropping off.
Conclusion? Don't have one, other than that kids are different.
Both came to us at 13 weeks, and both started out in the crib. Sam would just never settle without cuddles. He still asks for them during the night.

[kelceesmom]

As everyone else says you need to do what works for your family. I think most parents don't have intentions of co-sleeping it just happens because of circumstances. My daughter started out in a crib but after she had reactions to vaccines she is now up every 3 hours (at 12months of age) and my husband works nights, so for me it is out of convenience. I'm waiting for the magical day that it all changes but for now I go with the flow.

[traceyk]

We still co-sleep with Drihan at 16 mo. and we plan on it until she is ready. I don't see any problem with it. People always say "how do you get adult time?" I just say, "that's what the floor is for"

[intladoptionblog]

I just revisited this thread and have to update:
Sam at three years and EIGHT months, still has no interest in his own bed. The only thing that's changed is that he's now able to communicate very well his preference for sleeping with us. His sister, by the way (aged 15 months) is very happy in her own bed, which is great as Sam would not be one bit happy to share.
Is it a boy thing? A "first child" thing? Or just a Sam thing? Who knows?
He needs to sleep with us. Cj likes her own space. I'm just happy we only have one kid in our bed!

[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

We had that issue with my step daughters. I, for one, was COMPLETELY against it. They were 20 months and just under 4 years old when we met. At first we had little choice since we lived in a very small 1 bedroom apartment. Not only that, but it was every other weekend as well so I just dealt with it. About a year later, we are in our house where they had their own room. It was HORRIBLE getting them to sleep in their own room. To boot, the youngest...now just under 3...asked me if I played the "naked game" with daddy. As she went on to describe how her mother and her boyfriend played this game, it was pretty evident that the co-sleeping was still going on at her mother's house and they were not careful about not just sleeping. It was then I started to develop and issue with even having the kids IN our room. Call it a mental issue, but it is my private space where DH and I do our "thing", and it makes me feel uncomfortable. Even if DH worked late at night, and we all watched TV in our room, they were/are never allowed under the same blankets as me. I think it is my way of protecting myself from a vindictive EX that will stop at nothing to stir up problems.

Now, with the boys, I feel a bit different. They slept IN our room, but always in the bassinette or playpen. When they were very small I would rock them to sleep while I laid in bed, but I think I was always afraid of squishing them. Now, they both sleep very well in their cribs, but we shall see what heppens when they graduate to big-boy beds!

[sdiedre]

I have a 9 week old fd who came to me at 3 days. I had her sleeping with me from the start, simply because I was afraid of dropping her in my exhaustion with the every two hr feedings .

Now that she is sleeping around 5 hours at night, I keep her with me until her last feeding, then place her in a bassinet near the bed. Depending on how long she is with me, I want to get her into a crib once she sleeps through the night, simply for my own needs (SLEEP!!!!).

I also have a 2yo fs who has come into my bed a couple of times after waking up from a nightmare. This experience has taught me that I do NOT want a toddler in bed with me.....it's like sleeping with a hyperactive starfish - you constantly have a foot or hand in your face.

I rather agree that it depends on the kid and the parents and what works for them.....

[Emberbit]

I am one of those people who wakes every time a spider sneezes. I do not like to co-sleep at all ever for any reason mostly because for me, it means not being able to sleep at all. I admire those of you who can sleep with a child in your bed. When munchkin wakes up and wanders into the room, I wake up and walk her back. We handle whatever she’s frightened of and into her own bed she goes…or the couch, or her floor or anywhere else she wants to sleep (other than the bathroom) that is not my bed. If she really wont’ self-settle, I’ll tuck her in and sit on the glider in her room with a reading lamp. I’ll read until she sleeps or if she's sick, I'll read all night if necessary…but she can’t sleep in my bed or I won't sleep at all anyway.

At the beginning of the summer, I took over one of those 4 am paper routes for a friend for 2 weeks. 9 of the 12 mornings I did it, I came back to find my bed so full there wasn’t room for me. Munchkin tangled in the covers, both rabbits (also not allowed to sleep with me) under the covers with her, the black lab we were pet sitting sleeping on my pillow, and munchkin’s dad, sleeping oblivious without pillows or covers. I don’t know how he slept through the chaos that must have happened for the bed to be so full…