[2BaSFMom_inTX]

I am a single newly licenced foster mom with a question I hope you can help me with ... I will be fostering ages 10 and up. There are some places for after school care up through age 12, but I am not sure I want a 13-15 year old to be a latch-key kid for 1-2 hours. What do you do with the kids until you get home from work?

[Howdy]

I was lucky that my mom lived on the same property. By that age my daughter really didn't need any babysitting. Many days she'd go home on the bus with a friend (who had a stay at home parent or grandparent) or else a friend would come home with her. They did get into trouble sometimes (smoking, taking the bus to the mall, etc.), but it was mostly good. It would be very awkward with a foster placement though, our adoption had already been finalized for years.

Gee, I wonder what a person does do with a foster child that age?

[phxmama]

I am a single foster mom and a bio mom. Most day cares and after care programs stop at age 12 or 6th grade. The only place I have locally that will take older kids is the Boys and Girls Club. Of course they are less structured but do provide some supervision and usually have the older kids help with the younger ones. There are also after school activities that help to lessen the alone time (sports, going to the Y to work out, drama club, etc.) However it is for this reason I do not take kids who can not be left alone or alone with my son (15) for the 1- 1 1/2 hours between school and when I get off. I can get home quickly if needed but I still try to have my son and my foster kids involved in something at least 3 days a week after school. Currently they are either working out or going to sports activities.

[Sissy22]

really struggling with this right now started them walking to library after school m walked to my work but all 3 is too much

[Sueby]

We have a FS, 13 yo with FAS and he goes to afterschool care with a caregiver for $10 per day and I pick him up after work. My other 14 yo goes home by himself and does chores/homework, but the 13 yo is unable to be home without a parent around so this was our only option.

Our 17 yo will be able to go home after school in a week, since his afterschool activity will be ending, so I will be letting FS come home and stay with BS and giving him a bit of extra cash for this chore. I'm not sure yet how it will work out for next year, but the summer is taken care of with the 17yo being primary caregiver when we don't have vacation time booked off, again, for a fee lol! He is pretty much the only kid that FS will listen to and heed.

Without these options though, I have no idea what I would do with him especially with his disabilities. Don't forget, summer vacation will be the same, only with more time alone lol!

[foster2forever]

I think it's great you are checking into this stuff before you get your first placement.

I had it all figured out before I said "yes" to my first placement but didn't realize they would keep my 10-year old in his old school which is 30 minutes away from my home and I didn't find out until after he began living with me that his school is the only one in the county whose pre-care starts at 7:45a instead of 7a......

It's really, really hard to get reliable information from places without knowing the exact age of the child, what school he or she will be going to, etc. Even after you know that, it's hard to get good info. I recommend visiting places, meeting people & checking out how the place works before you get a child.

If I were you, I'd make sure you have a definite plan before saying "yes".

Keep in mind the following things I wish I'd known: summer "camp" ends at least a week before school begins and begins more than a week after school ends. Everyone seemed to know this but me.

Pre/after care didn't start until the second or third week of school because they needed time to "arrange the workers' schedules." That was crazy....and it's not common (most places pre/after care start when school starts).

The school my four-year old was going to (public, full-time preschool) has pre/after care. What they didn't tell me is that pre/after care is ONLY at the primary location (main school) and that my four-year old was assigned to a "satellite" location. As soon as I found out he was going to a satellite location, I went crazy trying to figure out how he was going to get to/from pre/after care and from the actual school. Everyone I spoke to said "don't worry, there's a bus." EVERYONE promised me that (I was slighly worried about a four-year old getting on and off a bus each day but everyone assured me he'd be fine). I found out the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL that there weren't enough kids in pre/after care at the satellite location to justify paying for a bus so, guess what, NO BUS!!!! That was a fun first few days of school!

Sports can be great....but good luck finding out what the practice times are and it's possible the child will have never played sports. You can't really join a lot of these teams in 7th or 8th grade having never played before . . .

The YMCA has been my saviour. We have a boys/girls club also.

Good luck!

[2BaSFMom_inTX]

Thank you everyone for some great advice. I am looking into schools now and the YMCA and city parks. At least I now know what questions to ask!

[takeuwithme96]

Wow that sucks all you went through with that. Good advice.

However, YMCA is usually not gay-friendly. We took our oldest daughter to a YMCA summer camp when she was 10 I believe it was - and it was horrible.

Originally Posted by foster2forever

I think it's great you are checking into this stuff before you get your first placement.

I had it all figured out before I said "yes" to my first placement but didn't realize they would keep my 10-year old in his old school which is 30 minutes away from my home and I didn't find out until after he began living with me that his school is the only one in the county whose pre-care starts at 7:45a instead of 7a......

It's really, really hard to get reliable information from places without knowing the exact age of the child, what school he or she will be going to, etc. Even after you know that, it's hard to get good info. I recommend visiting places, meeting people & checking out how the place works before you get a child.

If I were you, I'd make sure you have a definite plan before saying "yes".

Keep in mind the following things I wish I'd known: summer "camp" ends at least a week before school begins and begins more than a week after school ends. Everyone seemed to know this but me.

Pre/after care didn't start until the second or third week of school because they needed time to "arrange the workers' schedules." That was crazy....and it's not common (most places pre/after care start when school starts).

The school my four-year old was going to (public, full-time preschool) has pre/after care. What they didn't tell me is that pre/after care is ONLY at the primary location (main school) and that my four-year old was assigned to a "satellite" location. As soon as I found out he was going to a satellite location, I went crazy trying to figure out how he was going to get to/from pre/after care and from the actual school. Everyone I spoke to said "don't worry, there's a bus." EVERYONE promised me that (I was slighly worried about a four-year old getting on and off a bus each day but everyone assured me he'd be fine). I found out the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL that there weren't enough kids in pre/after care at the satellite location to justify paying for a bus so, guess what, NO BUS!!!! That was a fun first few days of school!

Sports can be great....but good luck finding out what the practice times are and it's possible the child will have never played sports. You can't really join a lot of these teams in 7th or 8th grade having never played before . . .

The YMCA has been my saviour. We have a boys/girls club also.

Good luck!

[mythreesonsjmo]

The agency might have some restrictions about kids being left alone, even at that age, and there are some that won't be able to be left alone because of behaviors. Something you will need to discuss before taking placements.