[hammondorgboi]

I have been approved since May, and have not gotten a single call yet. I'm a single guy, hoping for a 3-6 yo boy. Due to budget cuts, the county has laid off over half of its social workers, so the remaining social workers are so swamped, they don't have time to look over home studies of potential parents. I have had the child's bedroom furnished and ready for almost a year, and eventually, I wound up closing the bedroom door, so it wouldn't remind me of how long this has been taking. When I got approved in May, I opened the door again, because I was hopeful that I'd get a call any day. Last month, I began feeling really depressed about the delays, and decided to close the door again, because it was too painful seeing that empty room every day. My social worker at the agency has been out for a few weeks for surgery, but I'm planning to start calling when she returns. I think I've been a little too passive, and maybe I need to be a little more of a pain in the a#s (but nice). As Bill once said, I feel your pain.

[BigLex]

Originally Posted by hammondorgboi

I have been approved since May, and have not gotten a single call yet. I'm a single guy, hoping for a 3-6 yo boy. Due to budget cuts, the county has laid off over half of its social workers, so the remaining social workers are so swamped, they don't have time to look over home studies of potential parents.

Although I realize that looking at every homestudy/case that comes through a county would be a very lengthy process, I haven't seen that anyone else has raised your point about SW's just not having the time to review new homestudies.

IMO the best way to match and get kids to their forever families sooner would be to take each new homestudy and comb the system for any child who is not already in a Fost/Adopt placement. The next step would be to determine if the prospective parent is a good fit for the child, if not, look at the next child, and so on.

I know that would be a long process (and I know my example is oversimplified), but it seems better than having thousands of children in FC when there are approved parents waiting.

I hope you get the perfect placement soon!

[hammondorgboi]

According to my social worker from my adoption agency, the county simply didn't have enough staff to do the work of searching out the prospective parents, and told them that that kind of thing is "low priority", and had them focusing other things. To be fair, I spoke to the supervisor of Children's Services at the county, and he denies that is the case, although there is a big disconnect between what my social worker told me, and what he is telling me. Taking my own advice, I had decided to become a real pain in their butt, and put a spotlight on what was going on over there. I called the County Board of Supervisors, a state Assemblyman's office, my congressman, and even The Governator's office. I also sent a letter to the editor of the local newspaper. Within a few hours, the Assemblyman's office and a representative from the Board Of Supervisors had both called Children's Services to see what is going on over there, so when the Supervisor from Children's Services called me later that day, as you can imagine, he was under a lot of pressure from above, so I'm taking his denials with a grain of salt. Unrelated to all of this, I wound up getting an email the same day, from my social worker, that they might have found a potential placement for me. He's 5 years old. They sent my home study and photo book to his social worker, so I hope to hear something soon. Hopefully, I didn't shoot myself in the foot by my rabble rousing.

[countrychristian]

LittleBigMama I feel your pain. Il is a messed up state I live in too. Though I am not liscened yet, I signed up for 0-3 adopt only girl and was not told that wouldn't happen, untill the last class. I cried all the way home from the class I had at first been excited about. However after talking to everyone and reading on here, I belive we still have a chance. Might as well see after paying for all the tb test ect and going thru all the classes. I'm willing to wait years if I have too.

We even had a woman in our class change agencies after being told she HAD to change her ages for fostering. They told me and my dh to seek a private agency for a better chance. I asked them why they didn't tell us this the first day and not the last class. My husband had taken off work and we had driven 30mins to our classes! They said no matter what age we want we should be flexable and switch to 0-18! I'm only 29 myself. They said then we could say no if they call with an older child. One lady asked well isn't that a waste of your time and ours if we know we are going to say no? They replied no it gives us more people to call???!! That makes no sense at all,untill she told us a story. She said she had a 14 yr old girl who had been in and out of homes and had been calling all night to place,when she called a home who really didn't want an older child. However after sleeping on it all night the woman felt so bad she said yes the next day. The key word here is she felt sooo bad. So basicly they wanted us to expand our age range so they could guilt trip us into an older child.

The bad thing I see about that is people saying yes for the wrong reasons and the child having to be relocated again when it doesn't work,because the family really didnt want that age!

so like you I was so hurt and upset after getting my hopes up. I then started checking online and found this site and seen many people had adopted and fostered younger children. They(dcf) have no idea what child might need to be placed untill it comes right? So even if they mainly need homes for older children,that doesn't mean a younger child will never come along. I just know I will have to wait longer.

I did switch to fostering to adopt after talking to everyone here and I am considering to age 4. However my dh isn't wanting to up ages yet.

Best of luck to you. Your right it does feel bettr just to vent sometimes! Especially to people that understand.

[chloroxsis]

Oh I feel your pain.

Yesterday we had a meeting at my agency. They faced lots of people in your situation. They suggested to them that they consider doing respite or taking a kid that is a risk who does not fit their desires to get parenting experience. They said current foster parents are apt to get the new cases -- the babies. So, you'd get the experience they want to see; and you will put yourself on a higher call list.

It will feel better, but I know how you feel! I really do.

[just-breathe]

Originally Posted by BigLex

IMO the best way to match and get kids to their forever families sooner would be to take each new homestudy and comb the system for any child who is not already in a Fost/Adopt placement. The next step would be to determine if the prospective parent is a good fit for the child, if not, look at the next child, and so on.

I think you have it backwards, though. The point is to find a family for a child, not a child for a family. My county presents new homestudies each week at their "matching meetings". They briefly go over each NEW study and each adoption placement person can further review the details if they feel the study is a potential match for a child they have on their caseload. Otherwise it is up to each child's worker to review all current studies to find a match.

[chloroxsis]

I think it may be good for you to look at the signatures posters have. It will give you an idea of the time frame it takes to get a child. A month in this world of adoption is NOTHING. I know...it doesn't feel like nothing, but the system really doesn't work that fast as a rule. If you understand better how long it takes, maybe you can endure the ride.

Good luck!

[breakspencils]

Originally Posted by LittleBigMama

I am with a private agency, and was looking to care for a girl ages newborn-3yrs, thou I am newly licensed, I didnt think here in this big city, I would be still be waiting after a month, esp. how the agency told me they had children, in that age ranged!!

Thanks mommytoeli, I wish that had that here in IL, then I would have not wasted my time!!

it only takes one call though, to change everything. THey may well have lots of kids in that range but there may be other homes being chosen first for whatever reason. Truth is, we've been FP's for 14 months, we are on our 4th and 5th placement. We've had one 10 year old, but our requested age range was younger. I hear people say there's no babies, but our agency has several babies as well as younger kids. I personally have had 3 babies and currently have a baby and a 3 year old. they are out there.

[Kedu]

Originally Posted by breakspencils

it only takes one call though, to change everything.

That's so true! Our homestudy was finished at the end of March and we got the call about our preadoptive son in August. We were open to either gender, age 0-5, but expected to end up with a child on the older end based on what our MAPP trainers told us. Basically, they said if you want an infant you need to be open to legal risk (my state's version of fost-adopt) and even then you'd be waiting for a while, unless you were open to straight foster care. Well, somehow our homestudy ended up in the right place at the right time and we got a call about our FS from a completely different office than the one that did our homestudy. He was just over a year old when we met him. He was a legal risk placement, but both parents are deceased and there's minimal chance of any appropriate family members coming forward. We're hoping to finalize before his next birthday.

We got the call about him just one day after we bowed out of a situation involving a legally free almost 5 year old because we found out his foster mother was fighting to keep him and thought that was the best placement for him anyway. I was ready to start looking into agencies doing domestic newborn adoption because I thought we would never get a placement.

[BigLex]

Originally Posted by just-breathe

I think you have it backwards, though. The point is to find a family for a child, not a child for a family. My county presents new homestudies each week at their "matching meetings". They briefly go over each NEW study and each adoption placement person can further review the details if they feel the study is a potential match for a child they have on their caseload. Otherwise it is up to each child's worker to review all current studies to find a match.

I think the fact that there are THOUSANDS of children in the foster care system is my point. The current process doesn't seem to be as effective as it could be. It is impossible that every worker is considering every single potential family that is out there. Matching is a numbers issue. The more potential familes you consider the greater chance you have of finding a family for a child. It might be an OLD study that matches a new child.

[ScrapMonkey]

We have a team of workers who just place kids. Caseworkers are not allowed to place kids in homes, the team does it. I hated this system at first but a placement worker told me if I have an opening, to call her every week. And every week I have an open bed, I do. That said... she has then informed me TWICE of errors in our file! Once I got them fixed, we got calls. The last time, my adoption was not credited in the system so it looked like I had an open bed when really, we were full. Bummer, too! I was getting lots of calls for baby girls!!

Do not be afraid to call around. If you have a worker for yourself, some places do, call. If you have a licensing worker, call. Ask some questions about what to expect, what changes in your file might help you get calls faster, etc. Be bold but not annoying.

[just-breathe]

Originally Posted by BigLex

I think the fact that there are THOUSANDS of children in the foster care system is my point. The current process doesn't seem to be as effective as it could be. It is impossible that every worker is considering every single potential family that is out there. Matching is a numbers issue. The more potential familes you consider the greater chance you have of finding a family for a child. It might be an OLD study that matches a new child.

I totally agree with you that the system needs work. But I'm confused a bit. Through your process, once there is a match, then the workers move on to the next family/homestudy? Where does that leave the children that never get matched with a family? Waiting for a family within their own county to show up eventually? If the workers are busy looking for kids for families, no one will be looking for a family for the harder to place kids.

I think that adoptuskids might have a feature that is kind of like what you're suggesting. Families from everywhere can register on there, and fill out info that their system then uses to populate a "suggested matches" list. I'm pretty sure that social workers can do a "reverse" type thing and search for families on there that match the child's needs, too. Maybe not, but that's what I thought. Is that kind of what you mean?

[BigLex]

Originally Posted by just-breathe

I totally agree with you that the system needs work. But I'm confused a bit. Through your process, once there is a match, then the workers move on to the next family/homestudy? Where does that leave the children that never get matched with a family? Waiting for a family within their own county to show up eventually? If the workers are busy looking for kids for families, no one will be looking for a family for the harder to place kids.

I think that adoptuskids might have a feature that is kind of like what you're suggesting. Families from everywhere can register on there, and fill out info that their system then uses to populate a "suggested matches" list. I'm pretty sure that social workers can do a "reverse" type thing and search for families on there that match the child's needs, too. Maybe not, but that's what I thought. Is that kind of what you mean?

Clearly, I haven't worked out my hypothetical process. My writing was in response to the subject of this thread "I give up!" I wanted to acknowledge hte posters frustration and let them know that other people also saw the flaws. I hoped to provide support so that they WOULDN'T give up.

From what I've read, some people have inquired about children on AdoptUsKids and recieved no response (even when the child has not been placed). I'm sure that the worker is too busy to respond to a family that is not a good fit, but that family could easily be a fit for another case.

To me, it is irrelevent which direction the match is made, from finding a family for a child or finding a child for a family. Of course, a child wouldn't be placed with a family that wasn't a good fit.

My particular frustration is that in Santa Clara County, I was told by the public agency that they will not assist me in adopting a child from outside of CA. Meaning that AdoptUsKids would not be an option to me, unless the child was in CA. This is just another example of the sytem not exhausting all resources, especially in placing special needs children (of which I was inquiring).

To answer some of your questions, the child that "never" gets matched, could be a potential match for any new parents who come into the system (shouldn't be limited to county unless absolutely necessary).

If family A comes into the system and child C is a "hard to place" child but fits into Family A's age/gender parameters that is a potential match. Child C would not have less of a chance of being placed.

There seem to be too many families waiting for children who are willing to adopt special needs kids. A lot of people are posting about their frustration with the process.