[Ariah_Zada]

Another question! My first interview is coming up quickly and I am just wondering what kinds of things I am going to be asked by the SW? Also, are references typically asked to write something on your behalf or are they typically called and asked questions as well?

Just wondering!
Ariah

[missymissus]

Our references had to fill out a form about us (would theytrust us w/ their kids, do they know how we resolve disputes, etc.) and the licensor then called to clarify any ?s she had about their answers.

We were asked about our childhoods, our relationship, our extended families, and our experience with children.

[Melissa1978]

Good luck! I am still waiting to hear how my interview went lOL

i was asked about abuse i have experience, if i ever used drugs or alcohol, about mental illness, my general health, our marrige, how long we have been married, our kids, and their ages and any issues they have medically, why we want to be foster parents, what are the things in our lives that might work against us. if we are planning to have any more children....

just a whole lot of questions you would never answer to a perfect stranger but it is worth it to make your dreams come true

[xxsurroundedbyxy]

Missymissus is like ours but expect the questions about your childhood to include questions like, "How did your parents discipline you? Did they yell? Did they spank?"

We were asked what we do if our marriage became strained or stressed, if we ever see cousins or keep in contact, how we discipline our own kids, etc.

There were literally HUNDREDS of questions so be prepared for anything.

Kim

[Ariah_Zada]

Thanks for the replies. Sounds kind of intimidating. So, if during college I was treated (with medication and counseling) for an assualt, is this something I will have to talk about? Will having been on meds disqualify me? I am single with no children, so that should eliminate some questions. Thanks in advance for answers!

Ariah

[xxsurroundedbyxy]

Being single with no children will just bring a new set of questions like: Do you or have you ever babysat? What age of children? Have you ever worked with children in church or have close relationships with friends' children? What would you do if a child "fill in the blank"?

If the assault was a sexual assault, I would definitely bring it up and let them know how it was handled and that counseling occured and medication was taken. If you are still on the medication it will definitely need to be disclosed, if not, you need to tell them when you quit taking it and when counseling ended, etc. They will ask how you feel about taking a child that sexually acts out (especially if it would trigger feelings for you)? How would handle a child that became violent? etc. if it was that type of attack.

These will be very personal questions but I have found that if you just answer them honestly and not hold back, they will get a better insight into what children you need and do not need in your home.

Try and remember that they are to help you and are not the enemy. The want to place children with you, but they need to know you the way a best friend from childhood-adulthood would and they only have a couple of hours to do that so it requires some pretty personal conversation.

Kim

[onhazier]

In my interview, I raised the issue of the abuse I suffered as a child. I was asked if I ever disclosed it and received help. I stated that I had received counseling. Other than having to say what type of abuse I experienced, I didn't have to give details. My history has not been held against me.

Mention it. Answer the questions as you are comfortable. Know that your experiences give you insight into what a child coming to you has experienced and may be feeling.

The caution is that you have moved beyond your abuse enough to not personalize it when you learn of your child's history.

[enchansin]

I found when you been throw bad things, worked throw it. its kinda a plus.. because you understand possible placement feelings & know what to look for..
It will most likely help you, but they will ask you loads of questions.. just be honest

[Ariah_Zada]

Ok, thanks for the heads up. I have been through counseling and on meds (haven't been for three or four years now) and feel like I have dealt with the assault, but on the other hand, that doesn't mean it's something I want to talk about with a complete stranger, especially a man. At least knowing I have too, I can prepare a bit. Thanks.

Ariah

[mandy201o1]

I have been abused but not said anything in questionaires will i get penalized during interview

[jamie2882]

Our interviews were more along the lines of "tell me your life story starting from as far back as you can remember". This was kind of the take off point, then she would ask questions about certain things or tell us to elaborate on something. Now we're having a follow up interview to fill in any blanks. They definitely want all the little details, nothing is too personal. I myself had a rough childhood, surrounded by alcoholics, drug abuse, neglect, and emotional abuse. I probably SHOULD have been a foster kid. The social worker said experiences like these worked to our advantage because I could relate or understand what these kids are going through.

[takeuwithme96]

Well I was spanked as a kid but that doesn't mean that I do that to my kids. I have never and would never hit my kids. I was yelled at a lot as a kid, but the only time I yell at my kids is when I am yelling from the other room to tell them to come here or something. Actually, we have had to call Social Services often on other parents who are abusive to their kids.

Our kids father is in prison for abuse of one of our kids. We have been victim to crimes, never perpetrators. A therapist called social services once when we told her our 5 year old ran away but they investigated and I still have the proof it was unfounded of any wrongdoing.

We should be ok right?

Originally Posted by xxsurroundedbyxy

Missymissus is like ours but expect the questions about your childhood to include questions like, "How did your parents discipline you? Did they yell? Did they spank?"

We were asked what we do if our marriage became strained or stressed, if we ever see cousins or keep in contact, how we discipline our own kids, etc.

There were literally HUNDREDS of questions so be prepared for anything.

Kim

[takeuwithme96]

My dad is still an alcoholic. I was neglected too but my sister took care of me because my mom was depressed. I tried killing myself a few times growing up. My mom and I are VERY close now, and she has changed a lot but my dad has not. I have cut him out of my life, unless he will sincerely apologize and change his bad behavior. I think the State will see this as a positive parenting skill so that our household is full of positive people, not negative people. My mom and dad divorced when I was 10. My sister is not living as a good role model for her two kids. Our bio kids stayed at her house, but I would not have the foster child, because my sister's husband is abusive and has anger issues. My sister's daughter is exhibiting a lot of rebelling and out of control behavior, but she is an angel with me, and part of me wishes I could 'save' her but nothing I can do but support her. And of course there's no visible abuse, so nothing I can do.

Originally Posted by jamie2882

Our interviews were more along the lines of "tell me your life story starting from as far back as you can remember". This was kind of the take off point, then she would ask questions about certain things or tell us to elaborate on something. Now we're having a follow up interview to fill in any blanks. They definitely want all the little details, nothing is too personal. I myself had a rough childhood, surrounded by alcoholics, drug abuse, neglect, and emotional abuse. I probably SHOULD have been a foster kid. The social worker said experiences like these worked to our advantage because I could relate or understand what these kids are going through.