[SandyKassia]

When you decide to do foster care, are you allowed to "refuse" a placement?

We will be getting certified probably for 4 kids, but would only want to have this many kids all together if they were in a sibling group. Otherwise, would like to give attention to only 2 or maybe 3 (in a special situation) at a time (we both work and we want to make sure we are present to the kids).

Our goal is if a child gets available to adoption we would consider it, so we would also only want to get to foster kids that we would potentially be interested in adopt if it was a chance.

So the question is: if the social worker calls me with a situation that is different from what we want are we allowed to say no??

(Note that we do not want infants... we are looking for girls of any race, up to 9yo, open to younger siblings of any gender (up to 4 siblings). BUT we are not looking for FAS, ODD, important psychiatric issues.)

[athikers]

You can always refuse and you will continue to get calls. Remind them of "Why" you're refusing "Our preference is such and such which is why we won't consider a pregnant teen" (or whatever)

[makarios79]

Originally Posted by SandyKassia

When you decide to do foster care, are you allowed to "refuse" a placement?

We will be getting certified probably for 4 kids, but would only want to have this many kids all together if they were in a sibling group. Otherwise, would like to give attention to only 2 or maybe 3 (in a special situation) at a time (we both work and we want to make sure we are present to the kids).

Our goal is if a child gets available to adoption we would consider it, so we would also only want to get to foster kids that we would potentially be interested in adopt if it was a chance.

So the question is: if the social worker calls me with a situation that is different from what we want are we allowed to say no??

(Note that we do not want infants... we are looking for girls of any race, up to 9yo, open to younger siblings of any gender (up to 4 siblings). BUT we are not looking for FAS, ODD, important psychiatric issues.)

Yes you are allowed to turn down placements..I turned down my first 2 placement calls (1 y/o boy and 6 y/o boy)....because I "thought I didn't want boys" (Yeah I got over that quickly)

Took my 3rd placement call (a 7 wk old cc male)....Turned down my 4th placement call...(1 m/o baby girl) who just had some issues I didn't feel like I could deal with....

Accepted my 5th placement call (7 m/o baby boy) and on my 6th placment call (which occured the same day the 7 m/o who came as a result of my 5th placment call) I had the choice between a sibling set of 2 girls that were going to be reunified that were the gender and age range that I highly desired

...and 2 little boys that are about to be TPR'd (made available for adoption) that are still in my desired age range, but a lot younger than I wanted to accept at that time because I had just accepted placement of a 6 month old....and not the gender AT ALL I wanted to be placed with......BUT I chose the little guys because I REALLY wanted to adopt more than I wanted to be the mom of little girls... and I am now the proud mom of 3 little boys under the age of 3.....2 of which I will be adopting before the year is out....

I only wanted to foster /adopt girls intially, but I wanted to be a forever mommy far more than I wanted to be choosy about gender.....

So in a nutshell you can refuse placement..you know what is best for your family and it is is NO ONES best interest to take in a child that you don't feel will be good match for your family....

[DRCSGRANT]

Yes, you definately have the right to turn down a placement. I initially only wanted one infant boy that was soon to be tpr and I initially only had room for one child under 3. I ended up having another room open up in my house and the placement calls started coming. I had a placedment of 4 that were not in my age range that I actually accepted and then a group of 3 that I currently still have that are 7months, 2 1/2 and 6 years old. But when I got the call for the second group I had 3 separate calls on the same day and I had several kids (a 3 week old girl with medical issues, a 4 day old girl (ACS couldn't reach me cause I was in a surgery), a sibling group of 2 (2year old boy and 11 year old girl) so although I was very flexible and twice accepted placement outside of my normal parameters I still turned down many other placements that I did not think would suit me.

[teachbear]

It is wise to think about any exceptions to what you will consider. It is also good to ask as many questions as possible when they call. The first two I ask is why did they come into care and what is their race. I then if I'm thinking of taking the placement ask if it is a new foster child, move from a group home or another foster home (FH) (in most states you can ask to speak to the foster parent(s) the child(ren) are coming from) and if their are any medical, mental health, mental abillities issues. I also ask who the case manager is and how to reach them so that if they don't bring the child out themselves I know how to reach them.
It is hard to think of these questions when you first start getting calls or you get a call in the middle of the night. We got a call at 2am this morning about a 6 year old that was blind and a 1 year old with a feeding tube. We did not take the emergency placemtent as I could not miss work today as I had three IEP meetings to run. But we take medically complex childern and I told the worker in two weeks it would not be a problem. She then asked me three times if I said two weeks and I said yes, as I will be finished teaching for the summer. I figure it is much easier to make up sleep when you don't have to be anywhere or figure out if your daycare will take a child with a feeding tube. Plus it would have been my husband dealing with both children and the day care as I'm at work at 7am.
We have probably turned down more placements then we have taken. You will probably start to recognize the voice or the name of the people who call about placements. We live in a large county and get calls even when we take a break from foster care if they have trouble placing a child. But as several posters have said it is best for everyone if you make decisions on what is best for the child and your family and if you are stressed it will not be good for anyone.