[deberiksen2662]

i was sexually abused as a child. will this be a problem for me to be accepted as a foster/adopt parent? I did do therapy but I have no paper work to prove it Could anyone please help me? The paper work they gave to me has questions about this on there. Also the person who abused me was my brother. He lives in a different state. He has gotten help, I have forgiven him, healed, and although we sometimes talk on the phone and every few years I see him at my Mom's house I still don't trust him to be alone or to leave my bio children with him. So will this Impact my chances. Him{My brother } still being around every few years???

[ouska]

No, it should not keep you from being approved. I would just be honest with them from the start. This was something that we had to deal with on ours. When we went to the first meeting, my DH took the work to the side and talked to her about this. He wanted to know from the start if it was a problem. We did not want to was thier time or ours. Our agency did not have a problem with it. The just asked about how he delt with it. So again I say just be honest with them. If you want more information just PM me.
Good luck and keep smiling
Peggy

[dadfor2]

no, it should not be a problem. the worst thing is that they ask you to see a 'specialist' to make sure that you are okay to be around children.

its not unusual for them to ask people who have had some history of emotional issues to be asked. Its more to cover thier own butts if anything happens.

i would be honest, they are not lookng for 'perfect' people, just loving people.

[Ashbre]

I have the abuse in my childhood as well and although I was upfront with them about it from the very beginning, they ended up telling me that they preferred I do respite care for a year and then be re-evaluated. Only after I sought further information, was it even mentioned about providing verofication of counseling as a child/teen. And now that I've turned in what little I was able to procure, I am to be "assessed". My worker couldn't believe they were doing this to me as she had already put in my homestudy that I was a well adjusted adult who would be great for foster care. She also said that they normally only request verification or assessment if the abuse had been within the last 10 years (which mine was more like 25+ years ago).

One thing she thought might be playing into it was that we were given temp custody of our grandchildren after I reported my stepdaughter to CPS for neglect etc. She said they were concerned as to whether I'd be able to handle it all.

So now I just sit and wait to find out when my assessment date is.

Best wishes for an easier journey than mine (although I know that in the long run, it will all be worth it).

[mj77]

I agree, be very honest. You might be surprised; I've known people to be chosen for a child because of their history--being able to overcome. "our" chidlren in the system have most often come from horrific pasts and who better to help them than a parent that can empathize?

Best to you

[muddie]

I was also sexually abused as a child and I was placed with a relative by dss.

I agree with being very honest. They ask these questions to make sure that you are ready to bring foster children into your home.

I did 4 years of therapy, on my own. I also have no paper work to show it. But I received all my theropy at school and could have backed it up if I needed. But they never asked me for anything. I just let them know that my life does not revolve around what happened to me then and I have forgave, but never forgot.

They did ask if I have back flashes (I don't) and if I ever did (I haven't).