[Robin61]

My Foster Children See Mom 1 Hour Once A Week. They Have Not Seen Her For 2 Weeks. We Show Up Mom Comes Out With About 100 Braids A Bandanna On Tons Of Makeup. She Looked Rediculous. She Was With Her 17 Year Old Sons Very Pregnant 15 Year Old Girlfriend. They Were Just Chatting Like School Girls. The Mom Is 38. I'm Sorry I Need To Vent. Mom Bring Me Clothes For Fd. She Then Starts Going Through The Bag In The Middle Of Dss. The Young Girl Is Looking For A Ecko Outfit To Put On My Fd Like Dressup. I'm Trying To Be Good About This But Knowing What Life The Kids Are Going Back To Is Saddening. She Brought A Bag Of Candy And Gum Hes 2 Shes 1 Today He Has A Belly Ache. Yesterday He Would Not Take A Nap He Whined About Everything. Thanks For Letting Me Vent. Robin

[proudmomof4]

It's sad to see 'our' kids subjected to their bp but its the steps we have to travel through this fp journey. We are the repair parents when the bp acts up. I hate it.
It's a Blessing to be able to hold your peace during times like those. Keep up the great work.

[rtsmedley]

When I found out bparents were feeding our fchildren a bunch of junk food and pop, I had a hissy fit with the cw. They are supposed to be feeding them healthy meals or snacks. The cw talked to them and it helped a little.

Anyway, I suggest talking to the cw. I know that it is soo frustrating!

[bjhv5]

I total know where you are coming from!!!When J had visits with bmom she would give him coke,candy ,nothing but sugar which he does not get here(because he has bottle rot,no front teeth) and he is now almost 3 but then he was 20mo-30 mo. He would be on such a sugar high when he crashed it was horrible.
I complained to the cw as well and it helped some.
Hang in there! Do you know for sure they are going back?

[tpakra]

I don't usually post outside of the Indiana board, but I was reading this and had to comment. Our last foster child was 10 months old when we got her. She was still on formula and hadn't been exposed to any 'solids'...not even cereal. Under her doctor's supervision, we began transitioning her to cereal, then the baby veggies. She had only been on the veggies for a couple of days when bmom thought it would be a good idea to give her some chocolate doughnut holes. According to the visit facilitator, she had at least 6 of them. The poor child was so sick after the visit! She was crying and screaming all night, not to mention the mess she had in her diapers!

Of course, I called the case worker and told her that this was unacceptable. She agreed and said that the visit facilitator should have put a stop to it. After that, the mother was only allowed to feed her in accordance with the doctor's suggestions.

If the bparents are feeding anything other than healthy foods, you have the right to put a stop to it, especially if they are doing it in excess.

Good luck!

[locoenlacabeza]

Our FS bmom used to do this, she would bring the mother load of junk food to visits. I started calling her the disneyland mom. We had a discussion about it with the therapist and SW at a CFT and we all agreed that mom was ok to give one "treat" per visit. All other snacks or meals needed to be healthy.
At first mom wasn't to receptive but now she even makes her "treats" somewhat healthy for the most part.

[V8 Momma]

My 5 y/o FD is 67 pounds, wears size 10's and will eat anything in sight. After the first two visits with her Bmom and the visit facilitator reporting that pop and a HUGE candy bar were among the night's events, I took FD to the doctor (had to anyways- I had no medical background on her). The doc weighed and measured her, found that she is 33% body mass index which classifies her as obese. I explained to the doc that on visits mom feeds her junk, and asked the doc to write some "doctor order" or something. She wrote on a prescription pad that FD has 33% BMI and is considered obese, and that she is to have no candy or pop. I made 10 copies of this; one for her CW, visit facilitator (who asked for a copy for Bio-mom), teachers, GAL, etc- everyone gets a copy. Mom still tries to slip pop or chocolate to her at visits (to feel like 'she's the boss') but after 4 weeks of strict food monitoring, FD does not ask for thirds at the table and alot of times doesn't ask for seconds. She has actually stated that "she is full" and is done eating. This is a huge change!!! We have been working on healthy food choices and her new favorite snack is a small box of raisins.
**** AVOID ALL HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP- it's in alot of foods. This is too concentrated for our bodies to break down properly and overloads our 'insulin pump' which could lead to diabetes. Also it causes some chemical reaction in our brains to block the sensation that we are full when eating, therefore causing overeating. It is poison for our kids. (us too!)