[asweeet1]

Okay. I posted another post on here on the Ohio section, and if anyone reads this that read that they will see that I mention two cousins that my aunt had lost many many(+18) years ago to the state of Ohio because she was an unfit parent. Currently, I am awaiting a homestudy to foster and adopt 2 of the 3 more children she has had "since then" that have been with the state since December of 03.

Anyway, the two cousins I lost, I have sought to find for many MANY years. I finally posted on an adoption board yesterday and WOW, there it was a response. I got my cousin's name and phone. I called him, it was totally AMAZING!!! I was very close to him as a child and I wanted to try to become friends with him if nothing else and establish some sort of connection. I'm sort of like the "black sheep" to the side of the family that was involved when he was lost to the state, other than my having had a close relationship as a child with him. He seems to be doing really well. He was 6yo when he was taken the last time and only remembers "what was going on"(that's how he puts it), not people--places--times--or things. I totally understand that. Now, question, he told me that his "sister" lives with the foster family still. He said he "signed away his rights" and had moved away some years ago. He said that if I would like to meet up/talk to her(the sister) I would need to contact the foster parents.

Here is the REAL question for any foster parents out there. I do not wish to intimidate the foster parents or scare them. I do not wish to scare the sister(my cousin) either. She was 2yo when taken the last time and kept permanently. I just have a heart as big as the state of Ohio literally and I really love them as if they both(the bro and sis) grew up with me. I can't even describe how I feel inside. Maybe as if to burst because I want sooooo bad to have that part of my family that I was not given because my aunt could not properly care for her children. Is it her fault? Absolutely NOT. Why you may ask?! She is mentally impaired. She has the level of a 6th grader and is now in her 40's. She loved her children, just did not know "how to" be a "mom" by every sense of the meaning of the word! I, as a child, had no control over that! I do now and thus I will not allow other loved ones(such as the 3 children she is losing right now) be lost when I can and will do something. I love them! They are my family. Some families do not have the capabilities, but I do :-). So I just want to know how to approach? I have the family(foster family that is)'s address and names. I was thinking of writing a letter. I don't have a phone number for them and I think even if I did, I would not want to approach by telephone.

Any insight would be wonderful :-)

thanks in advance.

I'm also in the process of having 2 out of 3 of her children she has lost in december of 03 in my home. The SW is on vacation until aug 2, but I will call her then to make appt for her to do homestudy. They already had a lady come from the county where the mother and children(although they are in foster care, they are still in that county) currently reside, but there was no background check done. Now this SW is in my county. I am not interested in temporary placement and am in hopes that this would mean permanent placement since I am over an hour away and it's a different county. Not too sure how this works. Since I am family(although I do NOT have contact with that side of my family other than to call my grandmother occasionally to see how she is--she is close with my unfit of a parent aunt--I do not discuss any of this with her and she has never known what I am doing and I will keep it that way), I just wonder the process of things. Will fiancee' and I have to go to classes? I realize they will do a background check, what else may be involved?
The children have been with the state for over 6 months now and this is the 3rd or 4th time they have taken them from my aunt. They have had a total of 2 hearings and they keep extending. At the last hearing(according to my grandmother--remember she has NO idea what I am doing, she voluntarily shares information with me regarding the kids) in June, my grandmother stated that children services gave 120 more days. So we are looking at September/October before the next hearing. It wasn't until "after" that that I received the letter from my local county regarding a home visit. They(social services) have not told me the status or anything. I am in hopes to find that out once the SW returns from vacation. It makes no sense to me why they would go through all of this rather than to keep the children where they have been for nearly 9 months and stable, if they plan to return them to my aunt. My aunt is VERY unfit, so I don't see that happening. Any insight out there?

I am in Ohio if that helps.

Thanks in advance.