[Lisa0512]

Hello everyone,

I am having huge, and I mean huge, problems with my foster care/adoption agency. It started when I went into the office for orientation; I told the adoption recruiter at that time that I would not be able to take all of the PRIDE (MAPP) classes at one time due to vacation plans. The recruiter told me that the agency would do one-on-one classes for me. Turns out this is not possible. This started my problem.

Since then, I have had problems with everything from paperwork getting lost to not having my telephone calls returned. I have located a child through the District of Columbia's CFS and was told by the child's
SW that I could have an initial visit when my agency faxed a copy of my clearances. My agency REFUSED to provide this information though they have a contract with DCFS. Finally, my agency relented after a month and sent the documentation.

The latest and most frustrating issue deals with my homestudy. My completed homestudy has been sitting in the office for nearly two weeks. That might not sound like a long time but 1) I was assured by an adoption recruiter that it would only take 3 hours to review once it gets to the office. 2) The agency's lackadaisical attitude is impeding the background conference that I need to have regarding the child. 3) The agency head told me that she would call me back regarding the homestudy. I have left two subsequent messages to no avail. The child that I want to adopt is ten years old, has been in foster care for five years and has ADHD. She has met me once and I do not want to think that I am going to do a vanishing act. Of course I may not contact her until the background conference but the background conference cannot occur until my agency turns in the homestudy to DCFS.

Can anyone tell me what my next step is? The agency is contracted with DCFS so I planned on staging an impromptu one person sit-in at DCFS so I could speak to someone else about this problem. I cannot talk to the head of the agency because she is famous for not returning phone calls such as the one that she has not returned to me. I REALLY REALLY NEED HELP.

[hope4kids]

I had some real challenges with an agency once and had to call all the way to the top of DCFS to resolve it. It was not pretty. I was called in to a meeting with all the upper management of the agency and was not treated nicely. BUt the issue was resolved. Is there a foster parent advocacy hotline where you are? Maybe that would be a place to start.

[Lisa0512]

Thanks, Hope...

It is funny that you posted your reply today because my lacksidiscal agency approved my homestudy. I am a teacher and I was off last week but my agency head woke up and smelled the coffee when I innocently said that I would like to come in for a meeting about the homestudy.

Since I knew that the head of the agency hates for people to come by the office, I knew that this would prompt some movement. Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.

[lambeausam]

Hey, Lisa...

How much longer until you get to start visitation?

[Lisa0512]

Wellllllll, the child's SW has to schedule a background meeting. In this meeting I will supposedly find out all particulars about the child. If I am still sure that I want the child after hearing all of this, I can start the day of the background meeting to schedule day visits with her through her foster mother . I hope and expect the background meeting to happen in the next two weeks. Hopefully I will be able to start the day visits within 2 to 3 weeks.

[sosfive]

Hi lisa i do believe we took the classes together for the PRIDE classes, this is shane. I finished february 13th through family and child services. If this is you e-mail me at sosfive@hotmail.com. I remember you were trying to finish your homestudy to have placement of a ten year old little girl. I am going through a similiar situation e-mail me so we can talk.

[rindava]

Same kind of problems here in VA


I have no real matches, so I started calling workers who were supposed to be gettting copies of my home study to see where they were in the matching process (Lots of long distance phone calls, still no matches, most kids are placed)

It seems my social workers are also very happy with just putting kids on permanent foster care.

They actually ran off about 4 good adoptive families from my training group and every time I turn around they have some new rule.

Good luck to you all.

[mary112233]

Lisa,Are you by any chance in Ca?
Mary

[Lisa0512]

Hello Mary,

No, I am in MD. Are you experiencing the same types of problems? I know how frustrating these problems can be.

[Lisa0512]

My agency has submitted my completed and approved homestudy to Terri's SW. The background meeting with be on May 7th which is four days before Mother's Day AND five days before my birthday. What great presents for those two days.

[mary112233]

Lisa thats great.My problems now are somewhat different,but boy can I relate. I have been dealing with my county for almost 4 years but now I am done. I just can't take it anymore. Good Luck I sure hope things move swiftly from now on.
Mary

[Lisa0512]

Mary,

All that I can say is do not give up. Whenever I became frustrated, I would talk to someone. Luckily I did this process backwards and identified a child before starting the class and completing my homestudy.

I mean that I am lucky in the sense that the child had the most wonderful SW who was willing to work with me through this whole process. When I started to get frustrated about the process, she reminded me of why I started the mission. When my agency began to start acting stupid, she gave me ways to work things out. When my agency started to cause major problems, she worked with the agency and me to resolve these issues. BASICALLY SHE IS A BLESSING SENT START FROM GOD...

[mary112233]

Thanks Lisa.I can't really give up because I haven't finalized yet. I do foster care with the county and thats what I am giving up.This adoption will be our 5th adoption and 8th child so i am done anyway but I might have continued to foster if they were not so stupid.Their Loss!!!!!
Mary

[jaredsmom]

Talk about "deja vu all over again"! We contracted with a foster family agency to do the foster part of our adoption. Initially it was wonderful, but once the child got identified, it was very interesting how often the paperwork got lost, etc.

Our latest battle is that parental rights have been terminated, so that we do not need to be foster parents anymore, but they are
insisting that they come in and do a comprehensive safety study for "their insurance", which is only secondary to our homeowners liability policy anyway.

We were written up for having mouthwash in the bathroom -- they said if our adoptive son gets depressed he could drink it to get drunk since it is 50% alcohol.

Then they wanted us to lock our bedroom door so he couldn't come in at bedtime. I thought building family bonds was the reason to foster before adoption? If he has a bad dream we want him to feel free to jump in bed with us.

We are in Los Angeles County, and it tok 18 months for the county to approve us, before any of this even started, so your messages just tell me that the whole system is messed up, no matter where you are in the country.

Sigh. At least we have our son, and are counting down until we can formalize the adoption.

Maureen T, CA

[mary112233]

We did our first 2 adoptions with a private agency that placed kids from county DCFS.There were a couple counties so bad that they just wouldn't work with them. La was at the top of that list. From what I hear its still the same.
Mary