[suburbanmomgw]

I have spent parts of the past two days reading all the posts on the thread “My son is autistic and other wonderful things about him”. I have cried, and smiled and really been inspired to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

I must say that my son has not been diagnosed with Autism. The reason I have come to this section of the Forums is because he does have Sensory Integration issues and I know there are similarities. I was recommended by MY therapist (family/adoption) to read about how other parents handle the emotions surrounding a child with a “less obvious” (sometimes!) disability. As some background: I am a stay-at-home mom of 3 children. The youngest (2yrs), Alexander, is adopted from St. Petersburg, Russia. We brought him home Jan. ’04. Our 2 older bio. children are 6.5 (boy), and 4 yrs (girl). The entire family is still in adjustment mode on some level, but I am the one struggling the most…

To quote Stormy:
“What is the hardest part? Realizing that our world is just simply different. My son's life is different. It can be harder, toughter, and in my opinion, in some ways better. And my life as a mom is definately different. I look at the soccer moms, without a care in the world, complaining about thier botched manacure on their cell phone and I gasp. I don't know if i am jealous, having not showered in 2 days, or if i feel pitty, that their lives are so plain. But one thing I know. While my life is hard, while I am tired and my son is amazing...I wouldn't change it for the world. Well, I would take away some of his challenges. But thats it.”

I cried as I could completely relate! I am struggling with my feelings that our son is changing my life—and the lives of my husband and two other children! I often feel like it’s not “fair” and I am resentful of all the changes that I have to keep making. This undertone of bitterness causes me to be angry too. I am not usually an angry person, but since bringing home our son 8.5 mths ago, I have become very short tempered.

That said, I write all of this to say. I am greatful in the knowledge that many have walked where I now do. I am encouraged to know that it’s a battle and that I will have to keep fighting. That I am not alone. That my son is amazing. That I am doing right by him to seek every avenue of treatment at this early age. That I can come here and learn and grow and find support…