[coffee_please]

We are at the stage where we are waiting to hear if CYFS have "approved" our adoption application. I’ve been surfing the net for information on bonding techniques and just discovered in the last couple of days that it is possible to breastfeed your adopted children. What I would like to know is your thoughts on this and would love to hear from anyone with any experience in this. Is this common in NZ? I can only find information on American sites and am having trouble following it as a lot of discussions seem to be around specific products that I have never heard of before. Where can I go for more information in NZ?

[Shelley]

I don't have any info specifically for NZ, but if you go to the adoptive breasting resource website, www.abrw/fourfriends (I think that's the address, otherwiserun a search on it) there are plenty of Moms with info that could help you. SHelley

[coffee_please]

Thanks for that. I found it. http://www.fourfriends.com/abrw/

[Shelley]

Glad I could help. Good luck to you.Shelley

[coffee_please]

Me again. We have just been approved!!!!! YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY....

[Katrinad]

Congrats on your approval, well done for having the stamina to stick it out. We found the process unbelievable and have switched to fostering long term, waiting for a placement. Coincidentally, I think I have just thrown out some information on adoptive breastfeeding that my midwife copied for me from a book that I think was called "the breastfeeding handbook" or "the breastfeeding bible". Have you considered contacting a midwife for information? An independent midwife may be more approachable on the subject, or even ring your local La Leche League. The information I had was excellent and very in depth. It can be done! Christine did tell me that often times with adoptive breastfeeding it is more about the bonding than the amount of milk produced, although sometimes it can be totally successful. Just depends how much time you have to give to milk production. I was considering doing it myself had we been successful in adoption. Good luck. It's good to see someone posting here at last! Are you North or South Island?
Katrina

[coffee_please]

We are in the North Island. You? We considered long term fostering too for a while,but thought it would be to hard to face that one day we might have to give them up. Have they given you an idea of how long it will take for you to get a fostering placement? They can't give us any idea at all at this stage, but it is still a fair way off yet, because we are still working on our profile. Talk about hard. I've recently let my boss know that this could happen soonish (it's a new job and he didn't know my history) I was so worried, but he was fantastic. Whew. I'm glad to see someone here too. What a neat idea to be able to chat to people who know where you are coming from. Thanks for the info too. I hadn't thought about a midwife. What a great idea.

[Katrinad]

I also picked up the latest Little Treasures magazine, it had an article on adoptive breastfeeding. Get your hands on one. I think they sell them in the bookstores now. We are in Otago. We just heard yesterday that our fostering registration may not be approved because of some negative comments I made about the "Primal Wound" theory - or rather comments that didn't fit with their idea of how things work - in the adoption course. Can you believe it. We have three sons of our own. ****, we must be raising them all wrong according to cyfs. Wonder why they are such happy kids then?!?

[coffee_please]

Unbelievable, I'm so sorry to hear your news. Any chance you can modify their perception of what you said? We found that they seem to take everything you say so literally and seem to assume the extreme of everything you say. Like, during our home visit they asked us about smacking. Man I wish they hadn't. Talk about a hot topic. No answer was the right answer and everything I said just didn't fit with their idea. It was just horrific. How old are your boys?

[coffee_please]

I got the latest issue of Treasures Magazine and the article was wonderful. Thanks so much for that. I have learn't so much thanks to the info I have received here from you all on this site. Thanks Everyone. I know what I want to do now and I'm going to give it a shot. I have the support of my husband and my family and now all I need is that magic call.

[Katrinad]

Hi, sorry I have taken so long. We are embroiled in a rather large debate with cyfs re: the fostering because of some "attitudes" we have about cyfs themselves. I'm sorry, but I think most people would have some "issues" with cyfs these days considering events over the last couple of years. We are really getting the feeling that if we don't roll over and tell them we love them, we will be out in the cold. Silly me for thinking it was all about the children, and not whether the adults involved like each other or not. I'm a bit steamed, as you can tell. Best of luck with your adoption plans and fingers crossed too!!