[Jan Munster]

I am a single foster parent, only on my third placement. I am so lucky to have a good job with mediocre pay, a great family, and wonderful friends. I came into fostering loving children and wanting to parent and have a positive impact in the world, but NOT to adopt. My second foster child was with me for 10 months (age 2-9 to 3-7). I was his fourth placement, and he left me to go to a foster-adopt home with sibs. I would have been fine with him staying - I totally fell in love even though I also tore my hair out some days. I knew in my heart the moment he left that I would say yes to him returning forever... even though my brain said "NONONONONO". I also know in my heart that I did everything I could think of to make that placement work, and I'm still willing to do anything to make THAT placement work... but... I heard today straight from his new family that it is not working. He still calls here "home", is not bonding, etc. I am looking for hard-hitting, gloves-off advice about what I need to consider before taking any steps. Reunification is no longer in the picture, nor is a biofamily placement, and there is a history of substance abuse and RAD with older siblings. Of course, finding out more is a first step. But any advice would be welcome, including things to read or watch. Thanks. jan

[aunlanpo]

I'm here to learn about RAD too, so I can't help, but thought maybe a bump up would get you some kind of reply?

[Batty1]

I would read Love Is Not Enough by Nancy Thomas and check out her website (just do a search on her name). www.RadZebra.org is also a good source of information.