[GCS]

Can anyone here talk a little about parenting a child after AP?

We are in a place now that I believe attachment is good with our children and I need to change some of the habits I have developed during our time of Attachment Parenting.

Up until recently I would still comfort and hold Sam during/after a temper tantrum. These dont happen that often anymore and usually do now only when he is tired, but I need for him to understand that he does not get special cuddling for being naughty.

I just started with the thinking chair - away from us a bit for time outs (we used time ins until now), and I started sending him to his room when he has a fit at home telling him that he can come out when he's done. I was surprised how quickly and how well that worked. He calmed himself down in minutes and came out smiling and ready to move on.

I've been reading Love and Logic books and trying to create a new dynamic between us.

DH did not really AP the kids. He was traveling a lot and I was home, so it was all me. Sam listens great to DH but rarely listens to me and knows I am a softy.
Since he is not listening, I end up yelling. Not the way I want to spend my day with him. Things progress and we end up with a scene after which I am comforting him.

I like the Love and Logic ideas. Any other tools that help you find a nuturing approach to parenting?
Anyone else dealing with this or am I the only one who let AP turn from nurturing to coddling?

We are home 2 years in November.

Thanks!
Christina

[zebramom]

Love & Logic is awesome!!! It should be required reading for ALL parents.

AP will always be a part of your life, since our kids revert back to some of their "old" behaviors at certain times.

Try cuddling with him at sporadic times. Catch him off guard. He will start to realize that he can have cuddling without a tantrum. If your tantrums are coming at a certain time each day, try cuddling him before they start. Head it off at the pass.

[hotspice58]

Who is Love and Logic by? I have an 11yo who's really needy. I've found an AT and I have to get him set up but I need some ideas. If I'm not with him, there are incidences but I have other kids and I work and can't be with him all the time. Thanks!

[zebramom]

L & L is by Foster Cline & Jim Fay. There is also L & L for teens.