[mckenna]

i am the proud adoptive mom of a 2 1/2 year old. he was my foster son since 3 months of age and his adoption was final about a month ago. he has always been extremely attached to me. he wants me right by his side at all times. instead of him becoming more independant as he gets older, he seems to be more clingy. over the holidays, it was almost unbearable. he was almost hysterical any time i was out of his sight. are these symptoms of attachment disorder? he seems to attach to me too much.

we have an open adoption arrangement with his bmom. who really shows no attachment or bond with him. at this point, he knows her by her first name and we talk about bmom but i don't think he puts the two together. could the continued rel with bmom be detrimental to my son?

my son has been in the same daycare since 3 months of age yet crys every time i drop him off. does anyone have any suggestions on how to help him develope confidence in his self and less clingy to me.

[Dr. Art]

It does not sound, from your description, like a secure attachment, but more like an anxious attachment. I'd suggest holding off on the bio mom visits and spending a lot more time with your child to help facilitate a more secure and healthy connection between the two of you. If you can take a couple of months off and eliminate the daycare, that would be my best advice at this time. Consider claiming your rights under the FMLA.

regards