[feathergirl]

So, I dropped off my request for my file in November with the Post Adoption Registry. I was followed by a camera crew and rather pleasant reporter (hey, eggie!), exposed my somewhat private life to the public, and was brought face to face with emotions/thoughts/ideas that I never knew were there.

I was so excited and scared! Here I thought that it would only take a few weeks. It is now the first week in January, and no letter from the government. The worst part is that I was anticipating some sort of answer, and the discovery of an empty mailbox (okay, I'll admit to bills being in there) is becoming a daily disappointment.

My Mom and Dad have been surprisingly open and encouraging. I only pray that I am not causing them pain...

Never in my life have I felt so insecure, so overwhelmed, and so controlled by a handful of documents. Yet I also feel numb.

My daughter asked me shortly after Christmas if the information that I may receive about my birth parents would change anything. She asked if she would have to give up her Omi&Opa. I cried.

[cat77]

Hi there

I too requested the identifying information in early November and just received the envelope last week. It took me two days to actually open the envelope after I received it. I didn't realize how much emotion the contents in that envelope would bring. After doing research, I believe I know my birthmothers married name and address (she lives only 15mins away from me). I'm really quite scared about trying to contact her and how it will change our lives. I'm scared that she will not want me to contact her and though I've tried to prepare for that possibility, I think that it would devestate me.
Have you received your information yet??
I wish you all the best!

[feathergirl]

Nothing yet. The empty mailbox taunts me. But, what can I do about it? Blather on and cry in my coffee.
I have a mental block about what I'm going to do with the information. I can't even think of how I would, if I would, contact someone.
Are you planning to have an intermediary contact your bmother?
I fear rejection, but I fear an overreation of affection more. I prefer keeping my distance until I'm comfortable and taking things slowly.
Do you have someone to help you through this? My parents are being really good about this, and have made it clear that no matter what happens, they are there for me. Take advantage of those loved ones who can be your soft place to fall...

[cat77]

I'm sure they have thousands of documents to process and unfortunatley there is nothing to do but wait. I have great support from my boyfriend. I also have support from my family and although they know that I have the information from the government, I have not told them that I have located my birth mother. Although my mom says that she supports me, I feel that she is a little scared that she might lose her place in my life as my mom (which would never happen). I think its best that I do this on my own for now.
I have written the letter and think I will send it tomorrow by registered mail and wait yet again. I wrote a simple letter as I din't want to overwhelm her. I reassured her that I didn't want to disrupt her life and at the least wanted medical history. And now I wait.
I hope you receive your information soon. Do you already have the non-identifying info? Have you looked on http://www.canadianadopteesregistry.org/
I'm sure you have-but just incase you haven't.
Take care and you never know-maybe your birthfamily is waiting for their envelope as well.