[Yash]

Hi,

I was wondering how you paid for your adoption, particularly the single parents out there?

Thanks,

Yash

[lisa in venice]

NOt a single parent but in a single income home. OUr first two adoptions were thru fostercare so they didn't cost anything. The second two were private and on the cheaper side. We paid as much as we could as we went and everything else went on the mastercard. Stuff like the Attorney's retainer we were able to pay over the course of 18 months, many of the expenses were on a monthly basis so it was only when we got hit with big bills that we charged it.

lisa

[Yash]

Hi Lisa,

I adopted the first time around from foster care. I needed a break from the madness so I decided to do international adoption this time around.

I've been paying as I go, but I know with the big lump sums will be more than my savings. Did the interest rates kill you guys on the sums you charged?

Thanks,

Yash

[monica120]

To all that have adopted:
I will be starting a research paper soon and I wanted to ask personally all of the adoptive parents what the most difficult part of the adoption process was. My main goal in paper will be trying to explain the reason as to why adoption in the u.s. is difficult. For instance, why must it take so long? Why does it have to be so costly? I would really appreciate any feedback.

[lisa in venice]

We had several cards with very low interest rates, one from our credit union and one from USAA (organization for military people and their dependents) So the interest was not bad. Also with MIranda whose adoption cost 2x what Sam's did we had the per child tax credit which went a long way to paying off interest and the following year we got the adoption tax credit which paid off the balance.

Now since our adoptions were domestic neither one was too terribly expensive compared to waht others pay. The biggest expense in Miranda's adoption were the ones involving travel and inter state stuff. I literaslly doubled our costs.

MOnica,
adoptions are expensive becasue they involve expensive professional services. Counseling, medical and legal services that are just not cheap. In most situations if you had to pay for those services per hour for anything else it would probably cost more. Also agencies provide tons of social services to people in crisis pgs. If 100 expectant parents come to an agency for help they receive counseling, sometimes help with housign and medical expenses. Often these esrvices can cost thousands of dollars. Now the statistics are that only about 8-10 of those expectant families will actuall place thier babies and it is the fees that the adoptive parents pay that underwrite the cost of those social serivces. In other countries the government pays for that stuff. We as a society don't believe in that level of government support or the taxation to pay for it so the cost is born by adoptive families.

As for it taking so long that is a more complex question. For instance if you are open to race and can afford to advertise widely you would probably have a baby in a matter of days. If you live ina state with a smaller population adoptions can take longer, if you are only willing to work with agen cies that don't charge fees there is a good chance you will wait longer because those agencies can't afford the same kind of outreach that ones who charge can and often don't have the kind of services to attract and keep expectant parents. I you have very limited criteria for the kind of child you can adopt you might wait longer. There rae a limited number of babies available every year and if you rule out a majority of them then chances are that you might wait longer. Then there is the plain old luck factor. many adoptons happen out of the blue where someone knows someone who knows someone. IF you are a very private person and don't share that you are thinking about adoption with your friends, family and coworkers you will never hear about those kinds of situations.

Why adoptions from fostercare take so long is usually becasue of the lack of funding to the agtencies that provide those services. Sometimes the SW are so over loaded that they just don't have time to process your information. Then there are states that still have reunification at all costs biases. IN those states or even in counties within those states you will often find kids in fostercare for years before they are freed for adoption. In other states like CA, NY,NJ,IL you rarely find young children available for adoptions because they were placed in fosteradopt at a very youn g age and adopted by their foster family. Nearly 60,000 chidlren every eyar find homes that way and the number is growing as it builds on itself. States get a bounty for every child placed for adoption so not only does it cost them less to maintain the child but they get a bonus for placing them. When you do this enough suddenly your state agency has more funds to lower SW case loads and recruit more famlies which in turn means more kids placed from fostercare and more funds to improve the system. It is sad to say but far too many state run agencies have not figured this out.

As difficult as the system is in this country it is far more flexible then in most places. Here the vast majority of people CAN adopt. We have fewer restrictions and very few policies that actively discourage adoption like sme countries do. It certainly is not perfect but I perfere it to the systems described in most countries.

lisa

[Yash]

[quote=lisa in venice]We had several cards with very low interest rates, one from our credit union and one from USAA (organization for military people and their dependents) So the interest was not bad. Also with MIranda whose adoption cost 2x what Sam's did we had the per child tax credit which went a long way to paying off interest and the following year we got the adoption tax credit which paid off the balance.

Thanks for the info. I keep forgetting about the adoption tax credit I will get with my son this year.



Why adoptions from fostercare take so long is usually becasue of the lack of funding to the agtencies that provide those services. Sometimes the SW are so over loaded that they just don't have time to process your information. Then there are states that still have reunification at all costs biases. IN those states or even in counties within those states you will often find kids in fostercare for years before they are freed for adoption. In other states like CA, NY,NJ,IL you rarely find young children available for adoptions because they were placed in fosteradopt at a very youn g age and adopted by their foster family. Nearly 60,000 chidlren every eyar find homes that way and the number is growing as it builds on itself. States get a bounty for every child placed for adoption so not only does it cost them less to maintain the child but they get a bonus for placing them. When you do this enough suddenly your state agency has more funds to lower SW case loads and recruit more famlies which in turn means more kids placed from fostercare and more funds to improve the system. It is sad to say but far too many state run agencies have not figured this out.

Wow! I didn't know this about the fost/adopt program. I adopted my son through that progrm in CA. He came home at 5 days old.

Thanks again,

Yash

[mod]

Yash,

We had enough money saved for our homestudy but that's it. We too are going to use our credit card for the remainder of our agency fees. We looked into a bank loan and a Gold Option Loan from MBNA but the interest rates were still higher than our credit card. I know alot of these adoption resource websites say to ask your family for loans or gifts......that is totally not feasible for us and I can't imagine it is for too many people. We just keep reminding ourselves that eventually we will get the tax credit and that will help us pay off some off the debt.

Monique:=)

[Yash]

Monique,

Thanks for answering. That's what I've been finding the loan interest is just as much or more than credit card interest.

Thanks again,

Yash

[lisa in venice]

Originally Posted by Yash

Monique,

Thanks for answering. That's what I've been finding the loan interest is just as much or more than credit card interest.

Thanks again,

Yash

Bargining in here. Most loans are at a fixed rate for a fixed period so the rates tend to be better then credit cards. Credit card companies only make money if they can charge interest and fees which are generally much higher to make up for the relatively small amounts of the loans. A loan SHOULD cost you less then a credit card unless you have a low interest fixed rate card or some cards offer no interest for a year on cash advances. I think we used one of those for a remodel. We borrrowed like $50K and paid it all off when the house was done and we got a new mortgage so we ended up paying no interest at all. check those out.

lisa

[Yash]

I will check those out, Lisa.

Thanks,

Yash

[mod]

You are totally right Lisa. I have a fixed rate card thru my professional association that is having a promotional rate in addition to that for 0% thru April. The fixed rate is pretty low and I haven't found any loans that can match it.

P.S. I am anxiously waiting over here....Fedex'd our allbum this morning (finished it at 4am at the Kinkos in Culver City)....They are going to show it on Friday. i am am fighting the urge to email you every five minutes with silly questions:=)


Yash...if you find anyonther options be sure to share the info

Monique

[Yash]

Thanks Lisa and Monique,

I'll keep looking. And I'll tell you if I find anyting extraordinary.

Yash

[Guspiv]

We were blessed to find that my husband's company did adoption reimbursements for some of the fees. It was a GREAT blessing. For the rest of it we saved for ahead of time. You never know your company may offer assistance try to find out.

[Kat-L]

Originally Posted by monica120

To all that have adopted:
I will be starting a research paper soon and I wanted to ask personally all of the adoptive parents what the most difficult part of the adoption process was. My main goal in paper will be trying to explain the reason as to why adoption in the u.s. is difficult. For instance, why must it take so long? Why does it have to be so costly? I would really appreciate any feedback.

I guess my adoptions didn't fit the national norm. I'm a single parent and it wasn't a lengthy or expensive process.
For the first adoption, it was a six month wait and the total cost (including homestudy, agency fee and court costs) was less than $1600.00 (which I paid from my savings acct).
My second adoption took less than 2 months and cost $2975.00 (including agency fees, post placement fees and attorney/court costs). My company reimbursed my adoption costs for this adoption. I had to pay up front & submit a claim.

[Yash]

Thank you to everyone who posted and shared. I really appreciated it.

I've been trying to get my company to start a reimbursement program. They even have the literature Dave Thomas' foundation sends out to companies about starting one, but so far no luck with them. I'll keep trying though.

Yash