[tonyhemp]

Hello,
My name is Tony and I have decided to become a father at the age of 44. Wanting to adopt an 11 y/o I saw on a Tuesdays Child segment on my local tv station. Been to classes, homestudy is complete, and now it seems to have come to a halt. It is taking so long, I don't understand why. I call the agency and leave messages and they don't return my calls. I don't know how to get this moving again.

Any suggestions?

[MSC2471]

Tony: I know it seems like forever, but there are times that social workers have a large caseload or may be on vacation and unable to get back in touch with you quickly. Persistence is the key. If your local state has an adoption resource book through the library system, see if you can look up kids through there. Attend any adoption conference/ events that you hear about. See if there are websites that feature adoptive kids from your state, and look up their profiles.

It took us about 4 months from the time our home study was approved until we met our first daughter. The turn over from then until adoption finalization was another 17 months.

Keep up the good work and I'm sure you'll get what you are seeking soon.

Matt

[tonyhemp]

Thanks Matt, guess I was just venting.

[joskids]

Tony, I so hear you! When you see billboards all over local busses about how badly parents are needed for these children, yet when you really feel it in your heart to try do become a "doer" instead of a "watcher", you feel punished for doing so. Adoption IS NOT EASY. We've adopted 4 times and it was never easy. What can go wrong, does go wrong. I just wanted to write to encourage you to stay committed to doing this. At your age, you have plenty of wisdom and life experience to offer an 11 year old. Show the agency your commitment and join a group of adoptive parents. It will help immensely to be going through this with others that are doing the same. And best wishes. Keep us posted!

Josie

[ProspectiveSingleMom]

Did the SW say anything about what your chances would be of getting that specific child, and/or did you try submitting an inquiry about that child? I'm curious mainly because I also have a specific child in mind (a girl I worked with at a previous job who is now listed on a state photolisting). In my state, I cannot submit an inquiry about a specific child until I complete my home study, which I haven't even started yet -- going to orientation class in a couple weeks to finally get the whole process started. I just wonder how much I should talk about wanting to adopt that specific girl during my homestudy, because I am open to taking a different child if she finds another family or if they do not consider me a good match for her.