[borntampa1987]

I'm sharing this poem with the understanding that I will not be shamed for the way I feel. This is not a strike against my adoptive mother, and this is nothing more then me sharing something very close to myself.

My Collar Just Won't Fit-

I knew you so well...but only for a short while. I got passed around and when it was said and done you were gone. Never did I get to see your face, or smell your skin. I never got to feel the essence of having you as a friend. I know you though, I could spot you in a crowd if only you existed beyond my dreams. The one who rescued me regrets her decision and wishes to erase this image. She got one with a pedegree, now I am simply a pet mistakenly wanted and now not needed. If there were to be a pound for my type I would have a bright lil kennel tag with stars and comments like "a sweetie, so cute"...but no one would want an old dog like me. I'll find myself in the room, and I would never dream again. No matter the tricks I do or the bones I bring her, I will never dance as pretty as her own. My walks are never as long. I yearn to discover you, I am your reflection, don't you want to look in the mirror? Why is it so hard to find myself in someone else. I'll keep wondering these streets looking for you... One day when I find you, my tail will finally wag, and hopefully I will find myself in open arms... with a collar ment for me all along. A bright shining tag with an address and a name, so that I can say, this is me, I know who I am, this is my home. It will fit perfectly and look so pretty, I will carry it proudly, my identity victoriously displayed. One day, I will find you.

[spitfirema2009]

i can truely feel your pain as a birthmother i hope you can find her please understand that at timed in life we do what wwe feel is best for you so try to understand that this may of been a case of she did what she felt was best for you....if nothing else know that god loves all of us and we are all his children.

[Sammys1stmom]

You are precious beyond measure, dear one. If your 1st mommy could tell you that, I think she would, and more. This is what I've written for my little one. I think of him and cry every day for him. Know that your mommy feels the same(I believe).

Dearest Samuel

I never wanted you to go so far away from me
So I’m writing you this letter with hope that you will see
All in life that you would need I knew I couldn’t give
Now with the pain from losing you I’ll have to learn to live

I‘ll miss the feel of your soft skin pressed warm against my lips
Smelling your sweet fragrance, as your precious face I kiss
What I would give to hold you, Just once more, so tight
I ache to sing the lullabies that’ll soothe you through the night

If there’d have been just one small way to keep you in my arms
I’d be the one to nurture you and keep you safe from harm
I’d hold you close and cheek to cheek say all you mean to me
Now your life, thru pictures, is what I’ll get see

I know you’re in a loving place that waited for so long
To have a precious baby, to love and call their own
They’ll tuck you in and give you all you need to help you grow
And some day, too, they‘ll tell you how I had to let you go

And when they do, I pray that they can help you understand
That letting go of you this way was not what I had planned
For me it was the hardest choice I’d ever had to make (Even as you read this)
To let you go with aching heart into their empty arms to take

I know that God will strengthen me and wipe away my tears (yours too!)
And He’ll hold you close thru all the years, assuaging all my (our) fears
Everyday I’ll miss you, still wishing you weren’t gone
Just know that even from this distance, my love for you is strong



I never meant to hurt you and I’m sorry for the pain
While sitting here and aching so I wanted to explain
Please know you weren’t rejected , unwanted, unloved, or abandoned in any way
For I still hold you in my heart and dream of seeing you each day

Don’t ever think it was easy, choosing to let you go
And when you look back and see your life with them I hope you’ll know
With all the years of heartache and tears that it would take
I made the right decision for you, one I didn’t want to make.

Love, Mommy
09/28 /09


P.S. I pray time passes quickly, because I can’t wait to hold you again!!