[uTonyNashm]

I am a musician and writer. I have been playing guitar for 11 years and recording my own music for about 8 years. I write songs and lyrics constantly. I am in a band now and also have a little solo thing on the side.

My adoption issues have really affected my creative side my entire life, and I have never even realized it! When I look back at things I have wrote, it is very clear. These writings that I will share with you now are very recent. It touches on how I have felt my whole life, from my adoption issues to my sexual abuse issues...Here we go:

"Lonely Boy Broken"

Lonely boy with so much pain, in the corner crying
Can't show your face, can't show your weak, but there's no denying

Everyone is out to get you, your enimies are all waiting
You don't wanna live, live this way
And long ago you gave up praying

And what did I ever do wrong?
What did I ever do wrong?
What did I ever do wrong?
To feel this broken...

Your innocence, was taken from you, it was crushed and then forgotten
You kept it inside, and it ate you
Until you were left rotten

You feel your left, with the shell of a man
Will this lonely boy ever stop crying?

And what did I ever do wrong?
What did I ever do wrong?
What did I ever do wrong?
To feel this broken...

So you stand alone, and no one gets you, to everyone, you've been lying

But you've found love, and you let her in, she makes living worth trying

I hold her so close, and yes I hope, that all our sins have been forgotten

And what did I ever do wrong?
What did I ever do wrong?
What did I ever do wrong?
To feel this broken...

[uTonyNashm]

"Waiting To Be Found"


How do you know when you find yourself?
The more I search, the more i'm lost...

With the pain going 'round, it's hard to be
Be yourself, at any cost

I always have pushed everyone away
Now here I am, i'm begging you to stay

I've lived through so much, that was wrong
Still I can't shake, just how bad I feel

What do I do when I find myself
Being my own, worst enemy

I always have pushed everyone away
Now here I am, i'm begging you to stay

How do you know when you find yourself?
'Cause the more I search, the more i'm lost...

[jrainbow]

These are very good but you are right, the emotions are very raw. I'm so sorry that adoption has affected you in this very deep way.

[uTonyNashm]

Hey, thank you so much for reading them. You say raw like it is a bad t hing...is it?

Any other readers?

[uTonyNashm]

a re-visit...

[wantthedream]

I agree...very good, very raw
I wonder if this is how my son feels? He and I have had contact by phone and email but he is hesitant for a face to face. I am always second guessing myself....should I have searched for him? That's what I wanted, but did he? Will I ever have an answer?

[uTonyNashm]

There are 3 BRAND NEW songs up now at my music site.

I think a lot of people here can relate and dig...

These are the songs that I said were VERY personal to me and really emotionaly heavy. Here is a little backround information:

"Go on"--
This song is the ultimate "I give up" song. It is about when you reach that point in life where you wonder why the **** you even exist. So go on and take it all from me...but please try to leave my soul behind at least.

"Spend My Time Running"--
This is about the people that have so much pain and struggle inside themselves every day, and no one understands. The struggle is not known to many around them, so the fight inside spills over to the outside world and destroys any good relationships they have in life. It is too hard and risky to show the real you to the world...even harder when you aren't sure if you even know the real you, anyways.

"Lonely Boy Broken"--
Following along with the VERY personal trend, comes this tune. This is probably the most personal tune I have ever written...Lots of tears and heartache came writing this one. It is my life story up to this point in time. It has a taste of everything that has made me who I am, for the better, but mostly for worse--Sexual abuse, the scars of being adopted, depression, lack of self esteem and anxiety...All true and all pure hell to deal with.

Peace...and brighter days I wish to you!

[uTonyNashm]

3 BRAND NEW SONGS are up on my solo site--I have RE-MIXED all the songs and they are now complete!!!

They are THE most personal songs I have ever written. Very dark stuff. These songs really brought out some tears.

Please check um out and let me know what yall think.

2 more songs are coming very soon.

[uTonyNashm]

***THE BROKEN SONG SESSIONS--A TONY NASH EP***
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-All 5 songs are NOW UP!
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-These are 5 of the most personal songs I have ever written. Very raw, very honest, and very heavy with emotion. They contain themes of depression, suicide, lack of self esteem, sexual abuse, self sabotage/hate, and the hope to be found and the hope for a better life.

-I worked very hard on these songs and put my heart and soul into them. It got so emotional at certain points, that I thought of stopping the recordings all together...but I pushed on. I nearly broke down in tears during the second chorus of "Lonely Boy Broken".

-As they say, good art, never plays it safe...Take a glimpse into a tortured soul, yearning for a better way.
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1.Spend My Time Running

2.All Her Life

3.Go On

4.Waiting To Be Found

5.Lonely Boy Broken
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This was written, produced, and played by Tony Nash...(me)....

Recorded at Universe Mind Recordings Studio.

Peace, and I hope you dig it!

MySpace.com - Tony Nash - Buffalo, New York - Rock / Acoustic / Alternative - www.myspace.com/tonynash