[sleeca]

Its now a year since i had a chance to hear.. and its now easier... without you near. the yearning is simmering.. and eventually a day will come... when im no longer overcome... of the thoughts of you... to myself i am true... something you have yet to be... so consider this to be the day... that i am finally free....

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IM MORE THEN THAT!


im not a lier im not a freak
im the most trusting person you will ever meet.

i may be hyper, i may be a mess
but you can always count on me through your own distress.

I do care probaly more then i should
about your own issues that hide my own.

its just my way of covering up
in the way i have grown up.

i dont know who i am
like you know you...
i will never know me as you think i should.

you will never know how i feel or why i say or do...
just know that i am a person no better then you.

I cant control my feelings as most
and i wont try to cover it and boast

i am who i am
i am what i am
its all because of the torn up ****

the **** in my life the ups and the downs
the insults the frowns the proms and the gowns

the poor and the rich
the slobs and the sluts
yes i have been all of them...
but i will always have trust
trust in knowing i will never be
what they hoped in the kid that they see
the kid they saw at 3 weeks old...
who had no one there to cuddle and hold
the one who they cared enough to set free
to some family they would never meet nor care to see

until that one day they got a call on the phone..
someone wants to know why theyre so ****ed up and cold...

why did they do what they did to me..
but thankful they gave the life a chance to at least be..
be in the life they still try to endure..
not knowing who what where when or how...but at least in this world...

a world in which no one unless they too..
have been in their shoes to say ..." oh im like you"

theres not many of us who can be openly sound..
they usually try to hunt us down...
and keep us quiet and say we have no rights...

we were given up years ago we should be lucky and of fright...
we cant speak our minds we cant talk its to ill...

but cheer up my dear child now here take a pill...
take this to comfort your unloved world...
your just like the others so shut up and be still...
or lets see what else can we adoptees feel..
oh nothing until we are able steal..
steal the lives of others around us

trying to fit in like some unhappy clown.

then we have a family of our own...
and pray that they wont live our life as their own...

and then one day someone sick and deranged..
takes it all away and fills them with uneasiness and shame...

and they get away with it because theres no proof...
no proof of a life taken all in their youth..

so here we sit hoping, they can move on....
and be able to be someone that has yet to be found...

we pray and we wonder if they can and will have it better...
only to know that one day is actually never...

so when i asked to talk or to just listen...
think of the person who you may never have been..
a person with issues you will never understand
unless you walk in their shoes amoungnst the cruel sand.

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