Unsupportive dad..(my dad)
It wasn’t easy to tell my family that I was pregnant with "G", as she was a surprise. I am finding out that even now after our family has seen how good we are with our own daughter, there is some resistance with us deciding to adopt. We have told nearly everyone that we are pursuing adoption from foster care in our state. Our best friends thought it was completely awesome. My sister in-law was excited. My husbands grandparents offered to let us use them for a reference. I spoke to my dad about it and his response was “Why?! Why would you ever want to do that?!” He says there are other ways to help people without adopting, and basically to leave adoptions to other people. Well, our issue is- most people think other people will adopt but there are many, many children waiting for homes because most leave it up to others.
Now I get that he is a concerned father and I appreciate that he cares about our family but I don’t like that he doesn’t seem to have faith, trust or support for us. Adoption can be a crazy roller coaster ride just like pregnancy so it would be nice to have my dad be supportive since I don’t have a mom. He says he is concerned that if we got a newborn that we wouldn’t give any time to G and the added expenses would be a pain. He also says if we adopted an older child that G could be abused, molested and traumatized by that child. At this point I just don’t even know what to say to him besides “we feel this is a calling from God, not a selfish urge we are trying to satisfy. We have faith that God will lead us down the right path and we are praying that if it is His will- He will lead us to the right child for our family.”
I would love to hear stories, thoughts, comments and any advice…